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June 8, 2022

When You Want to Toast, Not Roast The Happy Couple


When you have been tasked with the toast to the newlyweds and all eyes and ears are on you, the story you tell, and your delivery will make or break it. In this episode, our special guest, Eddie Rice, offers strategies to help you stand out, be heard, and be memorable so the crowd will remember you as the professional Toastmaster!

Listen in as Eddie shares tips with the podcast crew to give a memorable toast that honors the couple and the event… and how if you can do that with your toast, it won't come off as a roast. 

Timestamps:
• [02:33] Kristina “I don't really know, I think some people realize the importance of toast. But it really is a big part of the reception.”
• [02:45] Michael “you know, what I hate is when people just wing it, and fly by night, and they just get up there and they make fools of themselves. I mean, they think it's funny, but really, it's a very important part of, you know, bringing this couple together, correct?” 
• [03:59] Eddie “when it comes down to giving a great toast, you want to honor the person and honor the event. If you can do that with your toast, it won't come off as a roast.” 
• [04:40] Eddie “ I think people when they sit down to write a toast, don't necessarily know exactly what it is that they want to say. Or they feel like they've got a blank page and a blank mind. “

For more information on The Ring The Bling And All The Things Podcast, visit: https://www.ringblingallthethingspodcast.com/

Kristina Stubblefield
Coaching & consulting: https://kristinastubblefield.com/
Website: https://www.ringblingallthethingspodcast.com/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theringtheblingandallthethings
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theringtheblingandallthethings/

The Ring The Bling And All The Things Community Platform: https://www.ringblingallthethings.com/

Michael Gaddie
Website: https://www.lloydsflorist.net/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lloydsflorist/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lloydsflorist/ 

Guest Information
Eddie Rice
Website: https://ricespeechwriting.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Rice-Speechwriting-106861895357977
Purchase Book Here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09VQTW746 

Transcript

Kristina Stubblefield  0:00  
When you have been tasked with the toast to the newlyweds and all eyes and ears are on you, the story you tell and your delivery will make or break it.

Michael Gaddie  0:09  
In this episode, our special guest Eddie Rice offers tips and strategies to help you stand out, be heard and be memorable so the crowd will remember you as a professional tastemaker.

Kristina Stubblefield  0:22  
You're listening to The Ring The Bling And All The Things Podcast. I'm Kristina Stubblefield, one of your hosts, along with my two good friends Michael Gaddie, and Sharon Rumsey. We are here to get you from down on one knee, down the aisle and into happily ever after. Our informative episodes, deliver valuable tips, trends, ideas, and advice covering everything from you saying yes to the i do's and all that happens in between and after. Now, let's get started with this episode. I am really excited to share this guest and all the tips and information he has to share with you. Eddie Rice, thank you so much for taking time to join us on our podcast. Mike and I are both excited to be here with you. And I know Sharon would be she's not in studio with us today. But she's always with us in spirit. So Eddie, thank you so much for sharing your time and coming on not only to talk to me and Mike, but our entire audience.

Eddie Rice  1:34  
Thank you, Kristina and Mike, I'm it's a pleasure to be here.

Kristina Stubblefield  1:37  
Well, before we hop right into this topic, and just to give you a little teaser about what we're talking about toast, there's so much more to it than you might think. Let me rephrase there should be there should be more to it. There should be. And that's what Eddie is going to dive into. But real quick, if you don't mind, would you share with our audience a little bit about you?

Eddie Rice  1:59  
Sure. I'm a speech writer of 10 years, I've done everything from TEDx talks, to wedding toasts to keynote speeches for just everyday people and anyone up to the level of college president and trustee, and then business owners and CEOs as well. So people come to me with just a jumble of ideas. And I helped take those ideas and shape them into a great speech.

Kristina Stubblefield  2:21  
Wow, and what better, I guess step to take, then to help people with toast. It's such an important part. I don't really know, I think some people realize the importance of toast. But it really is a big part of the reception.

Michael Gaddie  2:44  
It's a very big part. And you know, what I hate is when people just wing it, and fly by night, and they just get up there and they make fools of themselves. I mean, they think it's funny, but really, it's a very important part of, you know, bringing this couple together, correct? Well,

Kristina Stubblefield  3:00  
and be in being asked to do that at you must be very important, I would think, to the couple to be invited to do that, in that reception. And Eddie, in reviewing some of the information I'm excited to share with our audience, is that you have a book available. And I just I think it's fabulous. But I know today, you're going to talk with the audience about some tips in regards to their toast. So for our audience, this is a great episode that you can share out with whoever you're asking to be part of the toast or to do the toast, or even your wedding party. So Eddie, I'm gonna put you on the spot for a minute. Go for it. What is what is one tip that comes to mind? If you had engaged couples in a room, and you had one minute to say something to him? What would you say? I would

Eddie Rice  3:58  
say, you know, when it comes down to giving a great toast, you want to honor the person and honor the event. If you can do that with your toast, it won't come off as a roast. And instead you will tell stories and great things about the couple that you are toasting that will stay with them and long and live long in their memory forever.

Michael Gaddie  4:20  
Good. That's well said. Well said

Kristina Stubblefield  4:22  
very good. And he's probably thinking well, I hope so since what his background is but okay. All right, Eddie, where do you want to dive in?

Eddie Rice  4:32  
Oh, man, where do we want to start? I guess. I'm good. We're starting right at the beginning with the importance of brainstorming. Because I think people when they sit down to write a toast, don't necessarily know exactly what it is that they want to say. Or they feel like they've got a blank page and a blank mind. And this happens so often when people come to me they reach out to me and they say Hey, Eddie, I have no clue what to put in my wedding toast what in the world do I say? So what I do is I prep them with a lot of brainstorming questions, such as you know, how do you know the person? What are your favorite stories about this person? What have they been there for you? What makes? What about them makes you laugh? What about them makes you proud to be their friend or their brother or sister? Questions like that will really start to get those ideas flowing. And that will help you create a toast later on, when you then structure and outline that massive ideas that you collect.

Kristina Stubblefield  5:31  
That's really important, Mike, you know, because there are times and we've covered this topic before, but I think it was more about the do's and don'ts. And sidenote, please, please, please do not use your cell phone. When giving a toast, especially when when you talk about pictures. So that's just a side note. But when you talk about this, we have heard many, many things about people telling embarrassing stories, or something not appropriate to share in front of your audience, they're at your reception, you might think it's funny, but no one else gets it. The other thing is you may have had some drinks. And you know, you might say some inappropriate things. And I think Eddie would say to steer clear from that

Eddie Rice  6:20  
100% keep it PG or G rated. When the story you know, and with the stories that you tell, you have to keep your audience in mind, you have to ask yourself, you know, if I'm sitting down to dinner with these people is this the Is this the story that I want to tell. And that's what the wedding is, it's one big dinner, and two with inside jokes. You know, you and the couple are the only people who are going to get those inside jokes. And if you have to explain a joke to the audience, it almost always loses its effect. So you want to tell stories that everyone can relate to, in your speech, not ones that are just super secret, you can keep those for the bachelor or bachelorette party not for the wedding reception.

Michael Gaddie  7:00  
Well, you know, to add a I mean, what I hate when we go to a reception is when you sit there and they get up there and they'd go on and on and on. And it's like, what are we even talking about here, least you've got a diagram here to help them, format it and come up with a perfect thing. I just think it's you know, and sometimes it's too short. Sometimes they get up there and say, you know, want to wish the bride and groom luck. That's just as bad as bad as having a speech that's too long. So I mean, the information that you've got here to give these, I always want to say usually the maid of honors are usually pretty good. The poor guys are the ones that you know, you leave need to well, I'm in a little bit,

Kristina Stubblefield  7:43  
but I've also been in seeing the opposite. Um, where you would have thought that the one on the Bride side would have been like she's going to knock it out of the park park. But she's so nervous, or she's had a few too many drinks, great speech, or she spent time putting it together. And it she fumbles through it, where you think that she is going to do better than the groom's side. So I see the importance of how Eddie has put this together with structure and the other things he's going to talk about to really kind of help you through that.

Eddie Rice  8:23  
Oh, well, thank you. Yeah, I think structure is incredibly important. And so is length, you don't want it to be 30 seconds long. And you just say nothing at all. But you don't want that 15 minute toast as well. I tell people strike a nice balance in the middle, shoot for five minutes, seven at the very, very, very most. But if you can do three to five minutes for your toast and still get a great story in there, you're going to be in a very, very good spot to give a great speech.

Kristina Stubblefield  8:48  
Mike, I've actually been at a wedding reception, I should say, I don't remember how long ago this was. But the person on the groom's side, got up and said, I don't remember what I'm supposed to say. But congratulations to the couple and walked off.

Eddie Rice  9:11  
Oh my gosh, no,

Kristina Stubblefield  9:12  
let's raise your glasses. No. And people were just looking around like waiting for him to come back. Like it was a joke.

Michael Gaddie  9:21  
Well, and you know what, that's, that's actually an embarrassment. If that was my best man, I'd be embarrassed because, you know, as you you're a part of my life that I've asked you to be do this. And then you do that. And I think that's I think that's bad.

Kristina Stubblefield  9:36  
Well, and I'm sure Eddie can dive into this deeper, but I think people want to be heartfelt and they're not really sure how to put those words down. And it's one thing to write it down. But also, you know, getting it out and especially in the moment because there's a lot more emotions and everything tied into it. So I see the benefit of the structure and timing it out? Well, I

Michael Gaddie  10:02  
think this is great for the father of the bride. Also, you know, we're talking about toast from the Reception Reception. But you know, the dad always gets up and gives a speech. And I think that is, so he's the older. Everybody thinks that he should know everything and do it, you know, perfectly. But really, even older people don't aren't good with standing up and talking in public speaking.

Kristina Stubblefield  10:26  
Well, you're also talking about emotions. Yeah, I mean, for those fathers that maybe this is their only daughter, maybe they've not been through this before. It's like getting up on a stage in front of 1000 people and you've not, you've not spoken, you've not got up and given a speech in front of that. So Eddie, I'm sure that this can be applied to anybody given toast at any given point throughout the wedding at any parties, or events.

Eddie Rice  10:52  
Oh, very much. Yeah, the structure that I recommend in the book, I've got a few of them applies to maids of honor best men, Father, the bride. And just to really, you know, for the listeners back at home, the structure is this, the one that it's kind of like my go to, is you introduce yourself, you welcome people, you tell them who you are, then you tell one heartfelt story that summarizes your feelings for the person that you're toasting, you give one message to one member of the couple, you give another message to the other member of the couple, you give a little bit of advice at the end. And then you end with a one to two line, raise your glass and chairs. And that's all it has to be it doesn't have to be a big production. And I also tell people look, you don't want to have a long speech, because it's going to take even longer to prepare, and get it ready. Instead, it's so much easier to write out a shorter speech and prep that ahead of time than trying to get up there and give some sort of 20 minute monologue that's going to put everyone to sleep after about seven minutes.

Kristina Stubblefield  11:53  
Okay, so you just made me think of something? How long do you feel like people should work on this process? Like, obviously, I'm sure you're gonna say not the day before the event, of course, honestly, like what should a person set the expectations for him, what have you found is a good process. As far as timeline goes,

Eddie Rice  12:14  
I think if you give yourself a month ahead of time to write the speech, you're going to be in a pretty good spot, I would spend two weeks on writing it, and then another two weeks on your rehearsal and your delivery. And if it's a five minute speech, you can practice it, you know, in the shower, on the way to work, when you're out for a walk, wherever you could get those quick five minute breaks during the day, you can practice it. But I would, you know, make sure that the writing of the speech and the delivery and practice of the speech are given equal weight. Because you're right, you don't want to wait until the last minute to write it. But you also don't want to be writing in at the last minute where you have no time for rehearsal. And then you know, you're a nervous wreck on the day of, so I would make sure that you balance the two out. And I think giving yourself a month ahead of time is plenty of time.

Kristina Stubblefield  13:02  
So from the way you're saying this, you're saying rehearsing. I'm hearing you say not read off of something.

Eddie Rice  13:10  
Yeah, so I think it goes a little bit of both ways, what I would do is I would rehearse the speech enough to where you've internalized it, and your notes are just backup. So I talked about doing something called scaffolded memorization where you print out the speech that you want to give, it's all written out, you get used to giving that speech as much as you can, then you rewrite it as an outline with just kind of the big ideas on the paper. Give your speech then from that outline, see how well and confident you can do it. Forgive yourself for any mistakes that you make, then create a shorter outline, and a shorter one, until you can just get it down to no cards. And then that should be enough that you can use those note cards as backups. But you've practiced it so many times with those outlines shorter and shorter each time that you've started to internalize it and actually memorize it. It's a way to kind of trick your brain into doing it in short steps.

Kristina Stubblefield  14:07  
What about if someone says, I'm not a writer? I, I can't write. I'm not good at that. What do you say?

Eddie Rice  14:16  
I think I would love to say that we're all writers inside. But what I would tell them to give them some pretty good practical advice is you can do a few things. You know, first, you can use a voice recorder app, and just speak your ideas out loud, and then get them transcribed then later using like rev.com, or any other transcription service that exists on the internet. So I would tell them that and then too, if you're still stuck for ideas on what to say, bounce ideas off of others. Talk to members of your family that no this person that you're toasting, ask them for ideas, words they might want to say. And you're going to find when you're talking with others, that you're going to remember certain stories about that person and things that you wanted to say. So you don't have to go it alone. And even if you don't feel like a writer, you can speak it out loud. And that's going to be just good as just as good as sitting down at the keyboard and writing it out.

Michael Gaddie  15:13  
Well, I don't think you have to, you know, you don't want it to come across as being scripted either. No. So I mean, just like you said, you don't have to have it written out completely, I think it'd be more personal. If if you did get up there. Yes, you have in your mind what you wanted to say and practiced it, but not to actually read it off a card. So I mean,

Kristina Stubblefield  15:37  
and I've seen people actually do that, even read it off of their cell phones, wine by line, and it's you miss that emotional piece. Like, they're so nervous that they're just reading the line after line, and you miss that connection opportunity there in that moment.

Michael Gaddie  15:55  
I mean, I think it's something that you have to specially if you do not public speak. I think it's something that you have to just work with, and be yourself to, I mean, you want I would rather have somebody be their self, not joking or anything like that. But be yourself and know it's coming from your heart, and not just reading it off your phone or a piece of paper. Yeah, I totally

Eddie Rice  16:21  
agree with that 100% The end. So that's why I recommend the scaffolded memorization to where you just get it down to notecards. And you are more performing it. And those no cards are just there as backup. But yeah, if you're reading it, line by line, it's going to sound like you're reading a book up there. And that's going to bore people and they're just not going to get it and your lines aren't going to land. So even if you are using notes, when you're up there, you want to make sure that you're still looking out to the audience, you're still making eye contact with the people that you want to talk to. So that you make sure that those heartfelt lines truly land when you're giving the toast.

Kristina Stubblefield  16:57  
And Mike, I think to realizing that there's a tool out there like this, his book can help you. So you don't give up and get you don't get up and give speeches once a month. Or if you've never done that. But yet you've been invited to do that. There's some people out there that I feel want to deliver on it, they just don't know how to start where to start. And sometimes guys, sorry, not as much girls, but guys don't necessarily always want to ask for that help or don't really know where to turn. And to be able to have a tool like this where even if you don't apply everything that Eddie has in this book, there is some really good components to this, that can help and guide you in delivering what you want your way. And I think that's one of the biggest things is there being tools, Mike, you know, we're all about education and resources. And I think this can help move from A to B, and deliver a good quality toast, which people want to they just don't know where to start or how to do it.

Michael Gaddie  18:12  
Well, and actually, after looking at this, Eddie, I mean, I mean, I do some speaking and that kind of thing. And I'll be honest with you used to hate it. But especially being working with Kristina and Sharon here lately, it's gotten a lot easier. But you know, not just with public speaking, but just you know, having a conversation with somebody. There's a lot of information in here. That is tremendous. So I think I'm gonna invest in this myself.

Kristina Stubblefield  18:48  
So okay, at a so after, what other recommendations do you have or that you want to share? Because heavy, I can talk about all of these. Yeah. And he's done such a great job of breaking these out and really walking you through the steps. So Eddie, what else would you like to share?

Eddie Rice  19:08  
I think one technique that I haven't shared yet is to watch other speeches online. So YouTube is filled with wonderful wedding toasts. I mean, there are some just absolutely just great toasts on YouTube. So you can just Google best man, maid of honor father, the bride, it's going to pull up a bunch of them. And I think if you watch them ahead of time, you can start to get ideas and inspiration for what you want to say in your own toast. And that's what inspired half the book actually was for me to include real speeches that people had given so that people could see the principles in action that I talked about. And you can use the same structures and the same ideas these people had, and obviously tailor it to your own. But you can obviously do that with the YouTube videos as well. But I think we learn best by example. And if you have Good examples to work from, you're going to have a much easier time putting your own toes together.

Kristina Stubblefield  20:06  
Okay, so I have a couple questions. Here's what immediately comes to my mind. I feel like people don't necessarily know where to start the toe or how to start it. And they don't necessarily know how to wrap it up. Like, sometimes I've heard people kind of talk in a circle, and I gotta be honest with you, I have had to work on this part myself, not with a toast. But sometimes, like when I go live, or when I'm doing something like that, or giving a speech. When there's people live in front of me, I feel like it's a little easier. But virtually, you know, when you're almost like you're the only person there and you're really trying to find out how to wrap it up. I've heard from people, they just feel like a toast. They keep rambling because they don't know how to close it out. So can you give tips on opening and closing? Sure, super the shaking his head. So he's like, Yes, I can. As soon as you stop, I'm ready to go, Yes,

Eddie Rice  21:02  
100%. So for the opening, you just have to basically just introduce yourself and say how you're related to the person in the couple that you're toasting. I call this kind of the plain opening, it doesn't have to be anything grand. It's just hey, I'm Joe Smith, and I am Michael's best man today. Today, I want to tell you one great story about him. And then go into that story and tell it and then ending, I like to just do, please raise your glass, and then end with a quote that's specific to the bride and to the bride or the groom, that you are toasting. So what I mean is if they have a favorite song, a favorite movie, a favorite book, I like to find a quote within those and use that within the closing cheers. So you say raise your glass, in the words of, you know, here, enter your quotes. You say it, and then you just say cheers at the end, and you're done. So that should get you off the stage fairly easily.

Michael Gaddie  22:04  
Good information gets really good. So let me ask you this at a is say I've chose my best man in the maid of honor. And I'm listening to this podcast. And my best man and best maid of honor is not how do I suggest to them, Hey, get a copy of this book, because you're gonna need it bad.

Kristina Stubblefield  22:28  
You don't mean you come out and say you're not good at given speeches I need to help you this

Eddie Rice  22:34  
is a delicate conversation to have. And personally, I'm not married yet. And I've got some pretty good friends that I don't think would would mess it up if I asked them. But I think you can drop subtle hints, you can send this episode of the podcast over to them, saying hey, I just would love for you to, you know, listen in ahead of time. There's just some great tips within it. You could also you know, if you're super nervous and super worried about them giving the toast, you could even ask them not to. That's kind of extreme. But you could say look, I'd love for you to just enjoy the ceremony and give them an out for not giving a toast if they don't want to do it. That's another route that a person could go as well. And with being 2022. I know that there are some non traditional weddings that simply don't have toasts anymore. It kind of breaks my heart at times. But sometimes brides choose not to have toasts at their weddings at all, just because they are a little bit scared of what people might say. So that's another route. It's a very extreme route to go. But it is one option as well. But I would go with the podcast recommendation first have more of a more subtle hint of hey, take a listen to this. I thought it might be helpful for you. That's all you have to say. I think in terms of just you know, they'll get the message.

Michael Gaddie  23:58  
Well, I'll tell you what, this generation and in going to quite a few weddings that I have been. The younger generation does not want to give speeches. They do not want to go around to table a table and say thank you for coming. I mean, I've had bride and groom's tell me up front. No, I'm not doing that. And I think it's sad. But I think it's you know, I think that we're starting to see and hopefully by doing podcasts like this and letting couples know that it's very important to follow traditions, some traditions and traditions. Yes, there's

Kristina Stubblefield  24:35  
resources out there to help. And to go back to what you ask. One thing that came to my mind is you could say, Look, I know you might not be 100% Comfortable of getting up in front of people and giving a toast. I heard this great podcast episode with an amazing guest. And I wanted to send it to you because I think it may be helpful. You know, it doesn't even have to Be like, I want to help you, I want this to be easier for you, I don't want you to really sweat about this. There's so many different words you can use. I think sometimes in in today's world, people will be like you need this, you know, just come out with. But I think to Eddie, to your point, I think sometimes bride and groom's or couples don't do the toast, because they don't realize about asking somebody else or how to navigate through that terrain. And it's a, it's different, how the traditions are changing. And we always tell people have the event you want to have. Now, if you do not want to have toast as part of your event, and that's how you want it. We always tell people have it your way, do it your way. But I do feel like some of the traditions that have been around. It's it makes Wedding Special. And toasts to me are that is one of those items.

Michael Gaddie  26:00  
And usually those are one of the most memorable moments. You know if it's funny or sad, or whatever it may be. It's very important part of it.

Kristina Stubblefield  26:07  
And I don't know if you've read through his structure, but I really liked how you, Eddie, you talked about. You can be funny, like, you can share a story. It doesn't have to be distasteful, it doesn't have to be R rated. You can incorporate a story. One of the things you said just a few minutes ago. For those who may not know about toast, you said when the best man gives the toast and tells a story about the groom? Would you touch on this just a little bit? So for the let's just say the best man is his stories and what he talks about supposed to be just towards the best man? Or is it supposed to incorporate the couple as well?

Eddie Rice  26:53  
I think if you have the time, it should definitely incorporate the couple as well. I think it really depends on how well you know the other member of the couple, and what stories you have to tell about them. So if you have the story of how they met, and you want to tell that story, I think that's perfectly okay for you to go ahead and tell, you know, check with the other person giving a toast to make sure they're not trying to tell the same story ahead of time, of course. But yeah, you want to think about how you met the other member of the couple what impressed them about you, what you cherish about them, why they're going to make a good marriage partner, for the other person in the couple 100% Definitely give that heartfelt message to the other person and make sure that they're included in your toast as well. You don't want it to be one sided.

Kristina Stubblefield  27:38  
Well, and that so I hadn't even really thought about that. But Mike for those that maybe have went to school together college together, but you don't live in the same area, you've not been around that person significant other to realize that you can still do the toast. It doesn't have to all be about the couple. There could be subtle hints or something said, I think that's also important important to share. Because I think people don't know anything about they've just maybe attended a wedding where there was a toast.

Michael Gaddie  28:11  
What advice Eddie, would you give to someone that has never given a toast before and overcome their fears to prep yourself for that?

Eddie Rice  28:23  
One, if you have enough time, go to Toastmasters. It's a weekly group that meets and people give speeches, and they practice leadership as well. So it's a group that meets where you get prepared speeches and impromptu speeches and you get feedback in a supportive and affirming environment. And I know plenty of people that joined Toastmasters simply because they were going to be given a wedding toast and wanted to be more confident when giving a speech. And you can just Google for Toastmasters groups in your area to go join. And that will help you, you know, get opportunities to practice public speaking. And even if you wanted to practice your toast in front of them to and get feedback from the audience. And then second, if you're having trouble in the preparation stage, if you feel that you're kind of nervous, I recommend deep breathing. So you breathe in for a count of three seconds. You hold it for three seconds, and then you exhale for three seconds. And then you repeat that process adding a count each time for five and six. And what that's going to do is it's going to bring your heart rate and your breathing rate down. And you're going to be much more relaxed than when you were previously. So that's helped out a lot of speakers. You can do it right before you go on stage. And you're going to be in a much more relaxed confident frame of mind when you go up there.

Kristina Stubblefield  29:48  
That's really that's good tip.

Michael Gaddie  29:50  
I did a a wedding show for a aifd About three years ago. It was about 300 3000 people in the audience, and I remember standing backstage gearing walk on, I'm thinking, okay, Mike, I know you can do this. I know we were talking to yourself talking to myself. And a friend of mine was on there too. And he was actually coming in from the other side of the stage where we could see each other. We get up there, I was the one opening the speech, or opening the whole segment, and it was about an hour and 10 minutes long. But the first thing I said, I mean, I came out with something, and then my mind just went blank. And I'm not kidding, I don't even know how I stumbled over. And after I got stumbled over it, I did jump back into it. And it ended up perfect. But I mean, at first, you know, I guess it was harder for me, because I was comparing this to a speech is, I don't know the people at the wedding at all. But when it comes to me and talking to all my peers, I think that made it harder for me because they know exactly what I'm trying to teach them. So I mean, what advice besides what you just said to just a groomsmen or a bridesmaid to get prep forward to to do that,

Eddie Rice  31:09  
I think it just comes down to the practice that you do ahead of time, I would find out, I would find that kind of what I call the critical friend in your life, not the person who's going to be super positive 100%, or the person who's going to be super negative, but that person in your life that can kind of tell you the truth. And I would practice with them as many times as possible, and giving your toast. So find that person that loves giving good feedback that you can act on, and prep and practice as many times as possible with that person, as your audience, and you're going to be in a much better spot before you up there.

Kristina Stubblefield  31:45  
That's a really good advice and the breathing thing. Yeah, I've heard that many times, not necessarily exactly how Eddie said it. But just those few seconds can really add some clarity, and some calm. Right before you do something like that, a toast to speech, anything like that, Eddie, and be honest with you, I feel like this is a topic, we could sit here and go through, talk about discuss, give examples, and we be four or five hours in, I feel like what that means to our audience is, there's so much available in your book to help guide you no matter if you've given one before you haven't given one, you've never spoke in front of people, you don't know where to start. And I think that's what makes it a great resource. And I can't thank you enough for being willing to come on share with our audience. And we will definitely make a link available in our show notes where people can get access to that. I know you said it's available at on a couple of different places for purchase. I'm so thankful to be able to know you to be able to share this out.

Michael Gaddie  33:03  
Yes and great information. Thank you so much. I think a lot of people will learn from this. And even people who make it easier for them and calm their nerves

Kristina Stubblefield  33:15  
in. And I think too, even if you're not doing the toast, but you've got to give up and give a speech at work or you are leveling up in a company and you have to start conducting meetings and things like that there's so many other ways that this can be helpful. And Eddie before we completely wrap up. Is there anything else you'd like to share? And if If so, please do and if not? Would you just share a little bit more about where people can connect with you. And we will put the links for sure about the book available to our audience.

Eddie Rice  33:49  
Yeah, just one last piece of advice. It's what I said earlier, but I think it bears repeating, honor the person and honor the event with your toast, if you can do that, you're going to be in a really, really good spot. And then finally, you can find me over at Rice Speech Writing, that's rice just like the food followed by the word speechwriting.com No hyphens or dashes, just ricespeechwriting.com You can connect with me there, contact me if you want to speech. And if I'm not available, I have a team of writers that can help out as well who are just as good if not better than me. So I can definitely help you out if you do need some help from me. And of course connect with me on LinkedIn as well. I'm just at LinkedIn, /Eddie-Rice.

Kristina Stubblefield  34:30  
Eddie that makes Okay, I want to call out something here. So even if they don't, so they could get the book or you're saying you can also help people with writing their

Eddie Rice  34:42  
speech? Yes, I'm 100% available for that as long as it's not like right at the last minute. As long as we've got a week or two, we can make some magic happen.

Michael Gaddie  34:51  
So let me ask you because I was going to get into that also. If I'm doing a stage presentation, and I sent you information on The stuff that I wanted to say you would put it in words for me. Is that correct? How does that work?

Eddie Rice  35:06  
To an extent? Yes. So I would get that information from you. But then we'd have a brainstorming call, where we'd go more in depth on what it is that you wanted to say I'd ask a lot of follow up questions. But then from that, I can create an outline of structure and a speech from our conversations together. When I work with people, it's a true partnership. And that it's not just me writing on a topic and saying here, deliver this speech. It's really us brainstorming, trading drafts back and forth, and really working closely, one on one together to create a great speech.

Kristina Stubblefield  35:41  
Okay, Mike, this is the wedding podcast. But I'm glad you got that information. We will definitely be connecting up it sounds like but Eddie, thank you so much for not only sharing your tips and information, but also sharing with us about your book. I do think it's very valuable, and a great resource. And we really appreciate you taking time to come and talk to not only us, but also our audience,

Eddie Rice  36:07  
Kristina and Mike, it was absolutely wonderful to talk with you. Thank you so much.

Michael Gaddie  36:11  
You're very welcome.

Kristina Stubblefield  36:12  
Thank you. For all of our listeners. Thank you for tuning in to this podcast episode. We want to hear your feedback as always, did you find this topic beneficial? Mike, I think we're going to hear yes, definitely is that they're sharing it to someone who are you sharing it to. And hopefully this can help with making those toasts more memorable, but also the people giving them where they can feel more comfortable. And also enjoy that moment, because it is special that you've been asked or invited to give that toast. So Eddie, thank you again. And to all of our listeners. Thank you so much. Make sure you subscribe on your favorite podcast platform. Until next time.

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Eddie Rice Profile Photo

Eddie Rice

Author

The author of Toast: Short Speeches, Big Impact. Eddie is a speechwriter and public speaking coach with 10 years of experience in the field. He loves creating strong narrative-driven speeches that focus on balancing emotional and thought-leadership content. He has worked with executives, business leaders, nonprofit leaders, and everyone in between.