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Feb. 9, 2022

The Weekend Wedding Warrior & All The Things Wedding Day


Co-hosts Kristina, Mike & Sharon were excited to invite Maggie Heely back on the show to discuss all things wedding day. Maggie owns Weekend Wedding Warrior and they handle the logistics of your wedding so you can focus on what’s really important…Getting Married! In the episode, Maggie shares her number one tip of building a team of vendors you feel amazing about! That way when something goes wrong on your wedding day (and it will), the way this vendor team picks up the ball and runs with it (without you even knowing) will make all the difference! 

 So if you are a bride or groom to be or family of the betrothed… and you want to be the most well treated GUEST at your own event, then you should give this episode a listen!

Maggie Heely started Weekend Wedding Warrior in 2010, not long after her own wedding where she realized that after all her careful planning there was no one to pass the work on to on the wedding day. Maggie has a unique background. She was awarded a Masters of Science in Marriage and Family Therapy from Northwestern University’s prestigious Family Institute in Evanston, IL in 2006 and is currently a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) in the state of Kentucky. No, she won’t give you therapy at your event, but she does bring a unique crisis-management perspective and calming energy. Maggie believes you should be able to both plan your wedding and enjoy your wedding day. Let the professionals at Weekend Wedding Warrior handle the logistics of your wedding so you can focus on what’s really important…Getting Married!

Timestamps:
• [9:35] Maggie explains “day of” coordination being a misnomer 
• [12:55] Sharon explains feeling like an NFL Coach going to the draft when picking her vendor team for a wedding 
• [17:12] “That's the point. That is when all of this comes together… those years of working together… taking on challenges when something does happen… having your A-team, the day of -  it's game day. It's go time.”
• [22:19] Maggie discusses the importance of making a timeline…

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Guest Information:

Maggie Heely - The Weekend Wedding Warrior
Website: http://www.weekendweddingwarrior.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/weddingwarrior/

Transcript

Michael Gaddie  0:00  
Hey, today's the day.

Sharon Rumsey  0:02  
Wait, what do we need to do? What is even happening? Who's doing all these things? Are we even ready?

Kristina Stubblefield  0:08  
Join us for this episode as we speak with the Weekend Wedding Warrior herself. Maggie Heely as we break down wedding day. 

You're listening to The Ring The Bling And All The Things Podcast. I'm Kristina Stubblefield, one of your hosts, along with my two good friends Michael Gaddie and Sharon Rumsey. We are here to get you from down on one knee down the aisle into happily ever after. Our informative episodes, deliver valuable tips, trends, ideas, and advice covering everything from you saying yes to the I do's and all that happens in between and after. Now, let's get started with this episode. 

In this episode, we are talking about all things wedding day. And we have a special guest sharing I'm gonna let you do the honors for this one.

Sharon Rumsey  1:05  
I'm super excited for today. I literally was up late last night thinking about what all I want to ask this person because she's someone that before I even started my business I followed and kind of looked at here in our areas like Wow, she's she knows what she's doing. She's got this going on, have followed her ever since. And just someone that I absolutely love. Maggie Heely, the owner and originator of Weekend Wedding Warrior is with us today. And I am ready to share some information with her and definitely pick her brain as well. Maggie, tell us a little bit about yourself and how you ended up the Weekend Wedding Warrior.

Maggie Heely  1:42  
Yeah. So thank you so much. First off for having me. I'm excited to be with you all. I didn't get to have my can share in the last time I was here.

Kristina Stubblefield  1:49  
Yes. You're a repeat. Get it.

Sharon Rumsey  1:52  
I know. I know. I'm a very fun girl made the

Maggie Heely  1:55  
cut. So yeah, so Weekend Wedding Warrior is the company that I started 12 years ago. Now the anniversary. I'm like a couple weeks short of 12 years.

Kristina Stubblefield  2:07  
Congratulations on. That is incredible. That's yeah, you

Maggie Heely  2:11  
accomplish that. Yeah, I like to buy myself a gift on my anniversary. I'm like this is for me. So yeah, weekend when you were a wedding day coordination company. And my background is actually a marriage and family therapy. So I did not go to school or wasn't trained formally in wedding planning. But it's kind of cliche as the story goes, it was my own wedding that really inspired me to start this company I had I was living in so my husband was in the army. We were living in Louisiana. And my wedding was in New York, because that's where I'm originally from Buffalo area, New York. And, you know, I was like, I got this I can plan this wedding from afar, no problem. And you know what? I kind of did, okay, like, were there some choices I might have? You know, now certainly knowing what I know, because I was married 14 years ago. So this was prior to being in the wedding industry at all. So of course, there's things I would have changed, but not until the weekend of was I like oh, man, like I did not understand what goes into a wedding. How much management there is how much people are still going to be asking questions of me, like literally at the rehearsal on my wedding rehearsal as the bride. People were like, where do I go? Where do I stand? What do I do? who accused the music and right before on my wedding day, right before walking down the aisle, like the girls are lined up in front of me. And the first bridesmaids turn. She turns around, and she goes, do I walk now like to me the bride with my own man. And I'm like, I couldn't even hear the music. Like, you know, my adrenaline was pumping. Like literally I'm like, I don't know, is the music playing? Blue? You know, like, I had no idea. So like, that is when I literally was like, this needs to be someone else's job. Like I should be able to play on my wedding, but not work my wedding. And my mom shouldn't my mom was like so in a bridesmaid dress that had like snapped, you know, excessive dancing and like, you know, things like that, where I'm like, my mom should be like, having a fun time with this. You know, we we didn't even time it so she could get her makeup done. I mean, the stories go on, and on where I was like, ya know, someone needs to do this for a living. And I was like, Oh, maybe I can do that for a living. And here we are. And look at you now or 10 years later or whatever.

Kristina Stubblefield  4:14  
You know what? I'm so glad you just mentioned that because people don't know what they don't know. Exactly. And it's Yeah, most people out there probably haven't been married before multiple times to where you've been through it. You know how to improve on it. You can address things before they happen. Right? And a lot of those conversations are asked the day of the day before the week of and you made a very great point about your mom, your parents, the people closest to you are the ones that tend to be the ones to help out. Yep. And you want them to celebrate with you and be part of that day. So I'm so glad we're tackling this topic. I know it is a lot of questions that engaged couples that we come across Talk about wedding day and leading up to that.

Sharon Rumsey  5:02  
I think one of the most challenging things in our industry, and I don't know how you guys feel, but to me, one of the most challenging thing is things is education. When I, you know, when I meet a couple, educating them on on what is really going to happen, like you were just saying on wedding day, and I know for me, I won't do two weddings on back to back weekends. Because the week before a wedding, I'm going to get, I'm going to protect that couple from a million phone calls and what color socks am I supposed to wear from a groomsmen and you know, What time am I supposed to be? Where and how many people at the rehearsal dinner and who's allergic to gluten and, you know, just all those things that are going to come my way. So I won't do two back to back weekends. Because that week before is so hectic. Sure. So if if you don't have that planner in place, whether it be someone that does, you know, event management, or someone that is a full service planner, those questions are coming to the bride and the groom,

Maggie Heely  6:03  
right. Yeah, they're there. Those questions are going to be asked of someone.

Sharon Rumsey  6:07  
Yes. And I feel like not only Biden, Graham, but like Kristina was saying their parents, right should get to feel like a guest at their own event, like by goal is that they feel like the most well treated guests at that event, right. And it's so hard to get people to understand what it's going to be like,

Maggie Heely  6:26  
right? I mean, you're just spending, you know, I often hear from mothers like that I'm a gift to them. Yes. Because often honestly, the couples can get shielded to an extent. But the mamas are the ones who are running around, right?

Michael Gaddie  6:38  
Well, we hear I hear that a lot. Yeah, just having a planner day of or a planner for the whole wedding. Right? Is a gift, right? Because for one thing, it's not just a gift to the bride, but it's a gift to the mother, because she doesn't have to want to worry about it.

Kristina Stubblefield  6:52  
Right, exactly. So I'm gonna hop right in here because I think those that are listening, whether they have a planner or not coordinator, okay, I know so many of us. Okay. And that's a whole nother topic.

Sharon Rumsey  7:04  
Yeah, that's another thing.

Maggie Heely  7:09  
Owners versus manager versus

Kristina Stubblefield  7:11  
decorator. Right. Your number one tip for day have for an engaged couple. The number one thing that you want to share with our audience?

Maggie Heely  7:23  
Oh, you're putting me on the spot. So my gut instinct, which I'm a big believer in, like, just go with that gut is build a team that you feel amazing about? Meaning your vendor team,

Sharon Rumsey  7:35  
amen. And amen. Yeah, that's what's gonna make your day come to me is

Maggie Heely  7:39  
because anything then that fault, like something will go wrong on your wedding day, I promise we do 50 Plus weddings a year, something goes wrong every single wedding day, but it's how do we pick it up? How do we run with it? The couple doesn't even know most of the time. Right? That's,

Kristina Stubblefield  7:55  
and that's where additional shows come into play. Because they've probably seen it before, they may have dealt with a similar problem. Or they're built to take on that pressure of okay, this has happened, what do we do, right? How do we execute? How do we pivot? Whatever that word is? Exactly. And most of the time, thank goodness, the couple doesn't know. Right?

Maggie Heely  8:16  
Exactly. And the thing is that if you don't have a professional team that you feel awesome about or that you feel like you jive with because that's the other thing is it's like fit to me vendors are also about fit, right? It's, it's who's a professional, but who do you fit well with and who because you're spending a lot of time a lot of time and on your wedding day, right most important day of your life and these people are next you more than your best friend is to an extent.

Michael Gaddie  8:39  
So explain to me when like your day of or? Yes, I do. But when

Sharon Rumsey  8:47  
he said that, yes.

Michael Gaddie  8:49  
So you don't help the wedding? I mean, the bride plan out each vendor. Correct. Compared to Sharon does, right. So tell me the difference? Yeah. And how far out you work with a wedding or the bride, compared to what Sharon would do. 18 months out?

Maggie Heely  9:05  
Sure. Sure. Sure. And I'd love to hear more about Sharon's process and I want to hear about Yeah, so yeah, so I do flinch when people say day of because I think day of is just a misnomer, because most sounds

Kristina Stubblefield  9:15  
like I'm gonna show up the morning of your wedding. And we'll get it done right and and it's not like that. And if I

Maggie Heely  9:23  
had like a crystal ball to know everything that was supposed to happen on a wedding day and show up, I'd have a different job right if I had a crystal ball, like she said, the future we all will be doing something different, you know, make more money. But so yeah, I definitely think day job is a misnomer, because it suggests that you just show up that day. What I like to call it is wedding day coordination. There's a million different terms of it. But basically the purpose is that I take the couples plan, put it into my brain, right like put make sure everything is lined up. We do a timeline meeting. So what's happening when in what order throughout the day, a walkthrough so where is everything being placed per section? So who's walking down the aisle? And what order who's escorted by whom are parents married, right? Like who can sit next to whom, like, all those little details, then I get all the vendor contracts, and confirm and schedule all the vendors. So what I like to say often is if you don't have a planner or coordinator, all of your vendors come in with their own timelines, but they're literally not on the same page. Right? They don't necessarily speak to each other. Prior. That's one of the

Sharon Rumsey  10:24  
biggest challenges that I see making a timeline. Right. The photographer has his plan, and florist has his plan. And the caterer has their plan. Yeah. And I'm like, but your plans are bumping into each other.

Maggie Heely  10:34  
Right? Yeah, let's set it up for success. So yeah, I'm a big believer in like, let's work collaboratively with all the different vendors to get everybody on one timeline that works for the couple's goals, but also make sure that these vendors who you're spending a lot of money on, can do their best work for you. Right.

Kristina Stubblefield  10:50  
And what I hear you saying is you're taking the plan that they've put together Yep. and executing it. Yes,

Maggie Heely  10:56  
exactly. I become them or I become the mom and I say I but we are a team also. So I need to like give major props to weekend wedding warrior is multiple coordinators, we have six lead coordinators, all of them are better than me, in my opinion, Otherwise, they wouldn't work for me. Or I work for them just as much as they work for me, you know, so I shouldn't say I, I shouldn't be saying we. But really, you know, like, our job is to be them, and work the wedding in the way that they would want it to be done. But just a little bit more polished, a little bit more professional, because we can anticipate needs that they why would they know that just like at their jobs, they can anticipate needs, right? And then that way they can enjoy it. And they've been spending so much time and money on this one day. If you don't enjoy it, we're really defeating the purpose like

Michael Gaddie  11:42  
you You said something we were before we started recording and you said something that, you know, like the flower, the florist. You're not worried about the color of the dresses, you're not worried about this. And I work with a lot of wedding planners and you would not believe some of the wedding planners are more concerned about the color of flower than they are about the couple for that day. Gotcha and yet aggravates to death. Not talking about chair? No, of course, I tell you there are some wedding planners out there that I don't think they're focused.

Maggie Heely  12:13  
I think they want to be designers exact there. So there's, to me, there's two different halves of the brain. It's like there's the aesthetics and the design and the creative. And then there's the logistics practicality make it happen. How's it going to flow? How's it going to time, right and like to have to be awesome at both of those is what a planner needs to be I'm a logistics person that I'm just saying to say everyone on my team is to like we're I would rather work with a creative who like can make these beautiful things happen. Then tell you how did I feel

Sharon Rumsey  12:44  
like I feel like your plan or my job is to it's kind of like a coach like the NFL Draft. I'm a huge football for Yeah, so that's what I'm Oh my God, my bills,

Maggie Heely  12:52  
my Buffalo Bill. It was so brutal. But anywho

Sharon Rumsey  12:55  
I know you've heard my people football. But anyway, I feel like it's like an NFL coach. I'm going to go to the draft. And I'm gonna pick the best team that I can pick. Right. I know who I think the best florist is I know who I think the best cater for your budget. And what you're asking me for is, and I want to put together that perfect team, right? I want to make an amazing timeline. And I'm going to say who's coming in what door and what time they're going to unload. So there's no problem on wedding day. And then I I want to get out of the way and let them do their jobs and just set them up for success. Like you were saying, Yeah, I don't, I don't know. You know, like I told Mike, we had a phone conversation just the other day. And I was like, I had a meeting with a photographer who was telling me well, I want the florist to do this with the pipe and drape. So I have more light. And I want the makeup artists to do this. And I was like, whoa, whoa, stay in your lane. But like I've put together a really, I've put together a really good happy. I've put together a really good handpick team here. And we're not going to tell them how to do their job. Yeah, it

Maggie Heely  14:00  
can. Yeah, it's it's tricky. And that's a whole nother topic. Yeah, staying in our lanes and knowing where to crossovers certainly can make things Yeah, thank

Michael Gaddie  14:08  
you have a better relationship and you grow a relationship. If you're working with each other instead of telling each gender how to do their job, because that's what they do every day. Yes. And then you kind of show I'm not saying that. I don't mean this way. It's sanim. But then you show up and you say okay, we need to do this and this and this. Oh,

Maggie Heely  14:27  
that is the biggest, like challenge as a wedding day coordinator is because if I haven't worked like luckily now after doing this for a while I've worked with those relationships, our relationships are there. People know a little bit about us. But in the beginning, especially not being involved in any of the planning meetings, not having a relationship with people and showing up and trying to be like trying to communicate the couple's wants. This isn't about me, right? It's not about what I want. You're leading the charge based on what right but I've asked all the right questions to the couple to understand what their wants are and I'm advocating for them. So like Finding the way to ask vendors to do those things when they're looking at you like who you and I even get. I just had a warning on New Year's Eve where the DJ was like who you are. And I was like, Oh, this is fun. Forgot about this, about this feeling, you know what I mean? But yes, because it's like having those relationships and letting people jobs well is

Sharon Rumsey  15:18  
so and I'm newer in this industry than you are.

Maggie Heely  15:21  
When did you start working to remember? Well,

Sharon Rumsey  15:23  
it's been six years. Okay. Yeah, but I, my backgrounds in health care, and was the our team leader for when I retired. So that explains a little bit of the OCD that Mike teases me about all the time. Like, I worked in an environment that was like, if you didn't know every single thing, somebody died, somebody could die. Yeah. So I think I just I think that's the way I think, of course, but it she

Kristina Stubblefield  15:49  
just say, I think that's the way I think. There you go.

Maggie Heely  15:54  
I think we need that on your a t shirt.

Sharon Rumsey  15:57  
I know for me. So anyway, I took my business full time about four years ago. Okay. You know, had my years in the hospital, retired and took my business full time. So

Maggie Heely  16:07  
half of your full time business has been during COVID. Yes, fun.

Sharon Rumsey  16:11  
Yes. And I cried a lot. Yeah, yeah, really a lot. And I listened. I listened to your reels on Instagram, where you kept telling me it would be okay. It was

Kristina Stubblefield  16:20  
okay. Right. We're still here. And we're still

Sharon Rumsey  16:24  
I think for me, if I have a vendor team that I know, and that I'm comfortable with and I've worked with before. For me, it's kind of like the trapeze artists at the circus that swings on the net. I've used this example talking about Mike before, you know, you can swaying because you know, you've got the net underneath. Yeah. And to me, that vendor team is right is my net. Yes. Like, I know that they care as much about this wedding as I do, and they're not going to let us fail.

Kristina Stubblefield  16:56  
Okay, so I'm gonna hop in here, because those of our listeners that are taking all this in, we are talking a lot about relationships, we're talking a lot about team. And you may be thinking to yourself, Okay, we're talking about wedding day. That's the point. That is when all of this comes together, those years of working together, taking on challenges when something does happen, having your a team, the day of it's game day, it's go time. And that's why this is so important with your wedding day, coming to life.

Sharon Rumsey  17:33  
And I think whether you hire a full service planner, or you hire wedding day coordination, I think that allowing that person, you know, when you don't know who to pick to be your DJ, let that person have some input, because that person has worked with those people. So I really think one of one of the main things a planner can offer is those vendor recommendations. Do you offer vendor recommendations?

Maggie Heely  18:00  
So like I was saying, kind of, it's like, I think of our packages like that cookie recipe. I love that. Here are the ingredients you leave something out, they just don't taste right. Well, some people like chocolate chips, some people like oatmeal, right. Like there's add ons. Right. So one of our add ons is personalized vendor recommendations. We offer our opinion all day long. Like, I can't tell you how many times someone lately has been like, oh, who does draping and florals? Oh, my Oh, I know that guy.

Sharon Rumsey  18:20  
Yeah. I got you one. I got you. I know him.

Maggie Heely  18:25  
So you know, like, who does those things together? Yep. Okay, so I can just give names out and opinions to our clients that's completely included. an add on service would be like, if someone's like, Hey, I don't know where to start. Here is my budget. Here's what I like. Like I just had a call with a bride yesterday. She's like, this is the kind of venue I'm looking for. But I don't want it to be in this part of town this part down, I want it to be here, I need this many people, I need a band blah, blah, blah. So it's like taking all those puzzle pieces, putting them together. And then I find out what dates they have available, what the current pricing is, and I make them a spreadsheet. That's an add on service. That's an add on service. And then what I like to do is give them two to three options in each category. And then they make the phone call and they make the final selection. Okay, so

Michael Gaddie  19:05  
just by you saying it all that right there. That means that she is not just there the day Oh,

Maggie Heely  19:10  
no, there's no day. Yeah, there's no like I said, if I had a magic ball I've been doing a different job.

Michael Gaddie  19:14  
So how far out do you usually books abroad?

Maggie Heely  19:17  
It's it's changed with the business to be honest. Like I can be any it when I first started. Yeah, this year is a little crazy. But I would say 11 months out, it's probably like our super average, but we do two years out and then we've done two months out, you know, so we've, as long as we're available with which six of us we typically can blow

Michael Gaddie  19:37  
I have to say every time I know I'm doing a wedding with you. I mean it's it's so smooth and get that email that says we can warrior Thank You, Lord.

Maggie Heely  19:48  
Thank you that's exactly and that is you know, we want our couples to feel taken care of but we want our vendors you know you guys are those

Sharon Rumsey  19:55  
vendor relationships. You know, cuz I love my couples and I work with my couples like you your urine. Yeah, you get really tight. I know their grandma. I know their best friend. But we're gonna stay friends, but I'm gonna see my next weekend, right? You know, so those vendor relationships, man, they're so

Maggie Heely  20:11  
important. And we know that you're working hard. So we want to make it, we want to make your job easier. So partly, I jokingly but not so jokingly say that I want to like, literally intern with every industry and just be like, so what is it? Like? I totally agree, what is it like to be on a catering team so that I can better serve and better make my timelines? You know what I mean?

Michael Gaddie  20:30  
Well, you know, working with Sharon, almost every other weekend, yeah, it seems like you know, when you work together, and you form this relationship, and when it comes to, for example, tear down, you know, if if there's a wedding planner, or somebody that they don't even have a wedding planner, and it comes to tear down and we show up and they're loading their truck with dishes and gifts and, but if somebody there that I'm working with all the time, I'm going to chip in and I'm going to help I take my whole team and say, Okay, let's help share and get this done. It's a team, your

Sharon Rumsey  21:03  
team and my assistant, if we're pretty much done with our stuff. She literally without she's worked with Mike so much now that she starts going around, she knows she's gonna empty the water out the basis. She's

Michael Gaddie  21:14  
gonna Wow, awesome. She'll help me more than she does share.

Sharon Rumsey  21:19  
I'll be like, hello, I'm over here. I need you to come down here. But let's talk about I could talk to you forever but I know Christina is gonna get eventually make us wrap this up. What are some of your best tips for timeline wedding day timeline? Because I think to me, that's my absolute sweet spot. Let me sit down in my office with a little Muse I want to see what are your timelines?

Kristina Stubblefield  21:46  
Okay, it's all about the timeline, which every minute is accounted for.

Sharon Rumsey  21:49  
Nobody bother me and let me and I keep telling myself I'm going to start calling them guidelines because something's gonna go wrong. It's not set in stone. Sure. But my sweet spot is that logistics Yeah, let me sit down and figure out how long transportation is going to take to get from the church to the venue and are you going to stop at the waterpark for a photo and you know, where are you going to park and that kind of stuff? What are your best tips for couples maybe that don't have a planner and they're trying to sketch out their own timeline? Well,

Maggie Heely  22:18  
first off, make a timeline correct like that's going to be step one because a man and a man a man this is embarrassing now doing what I do, but this will tell you a little bit too much about my personality pre weddings is I was in a wedding by my one of my best friends got married, he was the first one to get married. I was a groom's woman love it really fun. Got to pick out my own dress and his bride handed out timelines. And I like Snickers like, what is this thing? Like? Oh, she's so over this. She's so I mean, we didn't say extra then. But like she's so actually so extra is my thought like, Okay, girl, cool timeline. Like somebody has too much time on their hands. No, that was a very successful wedding day. Yeah, because she had sketched it out. And now I'm like, I I don't do my child's birthday without a timeline. You don't I mean, like, I don't do Thanksgiving without a tie.

Sharon Rumsey  23:03  
I'm planning something for my daughter. Yeah, right now that I just talked to Mike about. And it's a project in our planner, and it's literally a party for my daughter in law. Yeah. But it's

Maggie Heely  23:11  
just because it that's the way that's how I think the brand says to me is setting you up for success. So I think the one thing that people need to do is make a timeline. And the second thing you need to do is buffer more time. And then you think because how far, how long it takes you to drive from downtown to point a point B in your little, you know, right sedan is not the same as a rd bus trolley, right? Or how long it takes you to do your makeup is not the same or you know, like there's just so many things that you need to buffer time in or then it's like somebody's got to go to the bathroom. Someone forgot their,

Sharon Rumsey  23:45  
their cell phone charger. It's all a zombie backup to this. And the other

Maggie Heely  23:49  
thing is moving people. So let's say you have a 200 person wedding and you're like, Okay, cocktail hours from 530 to 630. Dinner's at 630 Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. cocktail hour ends at 630 are you closing the bar to make sure people are moving? And then that takes 20 minutes to get people seated, at least sometimes, you know, depending on how many people depending if they're moving floors, etc. So just buffer more time and then you think and then if you don't have a planner, ask your DJ, your photographer, your band, whomever your caterer, what they would suggest and then like, put all those things together, put those puzzle pieces together to make one

Kristina Stubblefield  24:23  
will your person with the person help keep it on schedule with announcements and stuff like that. I'm over here laughing because it just came to my mind. When I first got married, it was back in the late 90s. And I'm sitting here snickering because I had a typed out timeline that I did myself but I also had large families involved. I had a shortlist that had 150 pictures on all your

Maggie Heely  24:59  
photography. For loved you correct, if

Sharon Rumsey  25:01  
I were your planner, we would have trimmed that we

Kristina Stubblefield  25:05  
also, there was an assistant to check mark after every photo was taken to make sure they were all accounted for. And the older people, this is why I'm snickering because when you said that, it came back to me, I don't know why all this is coming back. The older people, my grandparents at the time, those kind of people were first because it was going to take them longer to go from the church, to the reception. So allow them time and get them out to where they can get seated. But I also remember having on there, that between the church and the reception hall, that the limo was going to make a stop on the way, you know, because I just knew it was a large event and there needs to just be a stop at the liquor store. Oh, I was like to the bathroom where we stopped. It's okay, Sharon, you can if you can judge me, it's going to get little nips. Remember, I just said 150 people, or 150 items on a shot list? Yeah, those

Maggie Heely  26:07  
people needed a drink after?

Kristina Stubblefield  26:09  
Oh, an anti wedding party.

Michael Gaddie  26:11  
I thought you were talking about the shot.

Maggie Heely  26:17  
Everyone vomited. Yes.

Kristina Stubblefield  26:18  
But anyways, what you were just saying allow enough time. If you have larger families for photos, moving from one venue to another, or even one room to another. That timeframe, people

Maggie Heely  26:32  
just don't I can't tell you still how many emails I get from others who are like, okay, so we'll have 536 30 cocktail hour 630 Dinner dancing at 730. And you're like, oh, what just happened? No, no, no. Like, that's not because are you gonna do toasts? Are you doing a welcome? Is there a blessing? Right? Like, are you serving salads? Are you clearing out? Like, there's just so many steps?

Sharon Rumsey  26:52  
Is it a plated meal? Do that right buffet? So it's like, I gotta

Maggie Heely  26:55  
think of each of those steps and then give those

Kristina Stubblefield  26:58  
time. And I love what you said, Whatever you're thinking, add a little bit of time to it. Yeah, I always

Maggie Heely  27:04  
someone's got to go potty. You know, every time somebody said

Kristina Stubblefield  27:07  
potty and she said, add padding at the same time. I'm like,

Maggie Heely  27:12  
yeah, that add potty

Kristina Stubblefield  27:14  
is a really good Call Sharon, because you've talked about that before. It's it takes even your bridesmaids and things like that

Maggie Heely  27:22  
you're hurting people and you're likely hurting people hurting, not hurting accent there. But you're also hurting people who are drinking so just slow, and then they're happy and they're excited. And even if they're not drinking, they're like, you know, they're chatting and they're not focused on moving to the next thing like we are

Kristina Stubblefield  27:40  
sharing how many Brad's Have you had that right before all of it. I think you even recommend this is make sure you go to the bathroom. You know, they all drinking water. You know,

Maggie Heely  27:49  
Sharon's just a nervous like body thing.

Kristina Stubblefield  27:52  
And Sharon talks a lot about staying hydrated. You know, because it's a fun day exciting. You may be drinking,

Sharon Rumsey  27:59  
I actually have times and on my timeline, it will say sequester bride. Hmm. But I know in my mind, that means hottie. Three of us are gonna take her to the bathroom. I'm gonna make sure

Kristina Stubblefield  28:13  
she's like I will wipe. I know one of the key words.

Maggie Heely  28:18  
I'm not shocked. I'm

Kristina Stubblefield  28:20  
just but let's not lose. But one of the key words in this episode is obviously going to be potty. I've heard some stories. And honestly, Sharon, let's be realistic. That doesn't take two minutes. No, if you think you just go in and be you know, allow yourself enough time.

Sharon Rumsey  28:37  
Another thing like as Maggie was speaking that I thought about too is they don't they schedule that timeline, and it's just boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, all day. And that's sequester time I get my brides. Yes, we're going to go to the bathroom. Yes, I'm going to see if your lipstick needs touched up because you drink a water or something. But you need a second to just take a beat. Breathe. Yeah, just breathe, hang out with your girls hang out with your mom, like just take a beat. It can

Kristina Stubblefield  29:05  
almost come down to your hoppin from, from item to item on your timeline in a day. The days over in your what?

Maggie Heely  29:14  
Like blur. Like I remember at the end of my wedding day, I was like, looked at my then husband and now husband too. But like he was newly my husband and go in like, Oh, hi. Nice to see. Yeah. Because I don't know if we spent any time together on our wedding day. I mean, we didn't do a first look, which is a whole nother topic. But you know, so we got no time together before so it's like we didn't even see each other till 530 And then you're just a blur and seeing people from out of town and he's in the army. So like people are flying in and you know, you're like,

Sharon Rumsey  29:42  
Oh, hi. And you feel like congratulations. You feel like you have to talk to everyone because yeah, they've made the the trouble for your wedding. But you don't if you don't have a quality moment together. Exactly. Yeah, I totally want to love those.

Kristina Stubblefield  29:55  
I love talking about that. Because when we got married Josh and I we It was important for us to have that time together. And when, you know, we wanted to have more of that time with our family and friends and stuff like that, and it was really important to take that into consideration when doing SOS we didn't do a first look either. And because you're right, the day can be gone. And, okay. 1012 hours at your wedding day in. Hello, like you said, Yeah, are you doing is to

Maggie Heely  30:27  
see you. That's why I also I'm sure you do this to share my love to pack cake and like yes, in Champagne, and to go boxes with a couple because then they can just like sit and I bet picture them sitting in their hotel room and be like Hi. eating cake. Good. Yeah. Exactly. All

Kristina Stubblefield  30:43  
right, Mike. I know. And in here, I know. Sorry,

Maggie Heely  30:44  
Mike. That's okay. Ladies.

Michael Gaddie  30:47  
There's this one reception place. And I won't mention the names I find. But that we always have to do a room flip. And the gift have to go upstairs and they go to a bar upstairs. And you know, they can look down and watch us flip the room. That's usually a nightmare when it comes to timelines. I mean, I guess I'm bringing the subject got because I wish that guests would be more respectful, especially when they are doing a flip in a room. Because you know, yeah, the bride and groom's off taking picture somewhere. And you're all awful to be upstairs taken, you know, drinking, whatever. Yeah. And we're flipping the room. But they're usually I guess, trying to find a seat before we even have

Maggie Heely  31:35  
Alicia do a podcast. That is adequate. Have you done those yet?

Sharon Rumsey  31:39  
But we could do more like,

Kristina Stubblefield  31:41  
I think she likes us so much. She She just said she'd be willing to come back. Did you walk?

Michael Gaddie  31:45  
But the reason I said that is because of that timeline, right? You would not believe how many wedding planners I've worked at, and I see them pulling their hair out. Because this is not going to totally get

Sharon Rumsey  31:57  
that I hate for I hate a flip. I do them. I mean, if we got to do it, you got to do it. But I agree with you. It is I mean, I've been known to be like the Rottweiler that's in there going, I'm going to ask you to head on up to cocktail hour, because they won't get out.

Michael Gaddie  32:13  
I've never done when they're with you. And I would hate to do when they're with you.

Kristina Stubblefield  32:17  
Okay, but it goes back to what Maggie was talking about, though. If you are if you don't have a wedding planner, or a coordinator in your gotta flip the room right here. Make sure to allow enough time, right.

Maggie Heely  32:30  
Like in that case, I would say like who is flipping right, like who's physically moving those tables? Ask those people. So if it's your right, how long do you need? Like I know, some venues in town are like, we need at least an hour and 15 minutes. So we like your cocktail hour is not going to be just an hour, right? It has to be an hour 15 If we can get it done before then. But they won't guarantee it, you know, be realistic

Kristina Stubblefield  32:50  
about the time, right? Because it would also depend on how much stuff you have. Yeah, how many how much decor that's

Michael Gaddie  32:57  
only show up? If there's a lot of decor, we're going to be there. Sure me and my whole crew is gonna be there to help me Yeah, tables, chairs, whatever it needs to

Maggie Heely  33:04  
be right. And I think we're all I mean, that is when you want to see that actually would be really funny to like, watch that, like get a video of a flip. Because I'm actually I've been on round I've been like pushing, you know, like, yeah, dance floors over like you know little me like five foot me be like, I got this I got this as complete strangers

Sharon Rumsey  33:21  
helped me pick up this guy like you, you come here if you're not going if you're gonna stay in here, you're gonna work. It's a wild

Maggie Heely  33:27  
time.

Kristina Stubblefield  33:28  
Now, man, I've got a clip of part of one. I'm not sure when we'll put it out. But it involves even not even the same floor. And an elevator doesn't go to that floor. So you have to use a staircase that wasn't a flip, though, was not a complete flip. It

Michael Gaddie  33:48  
wasn't a flip. But I mean, not for you was adding to the reception.

Maggie Heely  33:53  
You're removing stuff from ceremony when

Kristina Stubblefield  33:55  
we were not gonna go there. But when you see the video, which Sharon has seen, right, she was like, Oh, my

Michael Gaddie  34:02  
and the bride's lovely. She's amazing. She really I remember,

Sharon Rumsey  34:06  
I did a wedding. It's why you

Maggie Heely  34:07  
agreed to do it.

Kristina Stubblefield  34:08  
Exactly. In the behind the scenes.

Sharon Rumsey  34:12  
I did a wedding on a rooftop. And I vividly remember this gorgeous day, we're on a rooftop right on the river. And after the ceremony, you know, the bride specifically did not want a full hour cocktail hour. She just wanted 45 minutes. And there were so many guests that because it was so pretty up there. They didn't they weren't moving. They got right up to the altar and wanted to take photos themselves instead of the bride and groom and wedding party. And I literally was saying I'm sorry, we're going to have to ask you to go on down to cocktail hour because the couple needs to take their photos and people looking at me like oh, I didn't I didn't think about that. Yeah, they're not they're not trying to be well, because

Maggie Heely  34:53  
yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think people are trying to be respectful. They're just in their own little worlds.

Sharon Rumsey  34:58  
100% another thing I would say about timelines too, that I have seen. Sometimes even with full planning, I have brides that they will sketch out a timeline. And want me to look at and kind of this is what I'm thinking, What are you thinking? When you put something on a timeline, and it's a, it's a task, it's something that needs to happen. Another thing that I always do is, you can just write the task, who's responsible for making that task happen? You know, like Mike was just talking about, we had to move an arch, right, like, I just don't want to put on my timeline or arch transitions to reception. You know, like, you Mike

Maggie Heely  35:38  
moves our mic moves from ceremony

Kristina Stubblefield  35:40  
to mic only by themselves. You know, I

Sharon Rumsey  35:44  
had, I had a wedding and we live the whole entire walkway was shepherd's hooks and candles. Dang. You know, it was gorgeous. But you got to know who's gonna like those candles, right? Like, that was awesome. Like, there's a theme, there's a thing on your timeline. Like, if you're trying to do this yourself, yes. Who's gonna do those things through to the end? Raise responsible

Maggie Heely  36:06  
and don't assume a manager is doing it or your caterer? Like, you know, you're here sometimes, like, oh, the caterer will do that. And you're like, the caterers don't even have lighters. Make sure it's for their cigarettes

Kristina Stubblefield  36:18  
in their markets. Make sure those don't assume right, anything when it comes to that stuff. Yeah. And don't forget about your stuff. If you are if you're getting married, that your ceremony is in one spot and reception another, if you're doing this yourself and something is coming from the ceremony. Not Oh, that needs to go. Who's taking it with them? Who's transported?

Maggie Heely  36:37  
First. You know, a lot of times I hear like, oh, the guest book, like, we'll just take that with us. And you're like, Well, if you take it with you, as the bride and groom, it's too late. It's there after the cocktail hour, which means no one's signing it. Well,

Michael Gaddie  36:49  
that's something that I hate, also don't have a guest, but they'll say, Yeah, we're gonna do these beautiful altar arrangements. And then can somebody take them to the reception? Right? Okay. Well, when are the pictures? You're gonna have pictures first, right? So those flowers aren't going to leave until the whole wedding brides gone. Right. And then somebody is carrying flowers in and the gifts are already seated. Right. And then too discouraged.

Sharon Rumsey  37:11  
I think that happens to planners a lot, because I'll have I'll have oh, I have in my trunk. Yeah. Well, Christina has even had to meet me one time because I had a bride moving these huge mirrors. And I don't have an SUV. And my fellow Jetta, yeah,

Maggie Heely  37:28  
Christina made an SUV. Actually. Maybe you don't maybe it's better that you're like, No, I can't carry that

Sharon Rumsey  37:32  
there's a plan for that. My husband just got a new truck. So okay. But um, literally, Christina had she, she just was helping me. And she came and she sat in the back row. And we had to move very quietly move these huge mirrors and easels out to her car before the ceremony was even over. But I have brides all the time that say why do I need extra flowers at the reception? Right? You're my planner can't can't introduce arrangements from the reception to

Maggie Heely  38:03  
Yeah, you know, that's, that's a good point. Like,

Sharon Rumsey  38:07  
and no, the answer's no, I cannot write and like I learned my lesson. I've learned my I

Maggie Heely  38:11  
do understand why that's like so good. In theory. I know. Is that a favorite word around here? But yeah, no,

Kristina Stubblefield  38:15  
it's not. No, it is not, I assure you, but she's getting better. They're trying to gain my

Maggie Heely  38:22  
boundaries. They have to listen to my boundary. I have listened to it twice.

Kristina Stubblefield  38:26  
Sure. They need to listen to it once a month. But just saying that they don't think

Maggie Heely  38:29  
about the phone. No. And I think like you're saying, like, so much of part of our job is education. And it's like, I get I get both sides. Like I get that you're bummed that like you just spent how much money on these beautiful flowers and you're looking at them for an hour and that are not even in that's it. But luckily, you'll get to look at the pictures of them forever. Because moving them is a B, C and D which is not going to be what you want. Or like, Oh, my least favorite is like I'm going to repurpose the chairs. The chairs from the Sarah just gonna carry him in who's carrying him in. I'm carrying a man. I mean, I could carry him in but you really want to watch five foot me like on two drives? You're like no, you don't want no one you don't guess No, I see that. Yes, so

Michael Gaddie  39:06  
I don't want to carry there.

Sharon Rumsey  39:08  
That's a whole that's a whole nother no from me. We're not gonna ask. Wedding right after like literally kind of started thinking about I've had brides today somebody

Kristina Stubblefield  39:17  
really came across that before about moving your

Maggie Heely  39:21  
hair goes, yeah. officiant at the end just makes an announcement. Everyone grab your chair and move it on over

Sharon Rumsey  39:26  
and it's 100 degrees and you're in a suit at My Old Kentucky Home State Park and you have to walk all the way across Locust

Maggie Heely  39:32  
Grove. It was about 100

Kristina Stubblefield  39:34  
Yeah, bring my own bag chair. Yeah. Oh. I mean, that I'm saying is did did the invitation say bring your own chair? No, I've

Maggie Heely  39:42  
only I didn't have it had a BYOD. Chair. I've had a BYOD fork. Have you heard of that one? At some? Yeah. I had someone that was bi o fork, because they wanted to collect they wanted their life to start with a fork from everybody's house. And so everyone just like and some people brought chopsticks So it was like this.

Kristina Stubblefield  40:02  
That's unique. But then

Sharon Rumsey  40:03  
But then who got to collect? Yeah, the dirty forks. Yeah. Hello.

Kristina Stubblefield  40:07  
Did you wash them off?

Maggie Heely  40:08  
Hell no. Okay, no, I'm not walking.

Sharon Rumsey  40:12  
I'm not washing no dishes. No, I put

Kristina Stubblefield  40:14  
it in a truck stuck on the chair.

Sharon Rumsey  40:17  
Oh, that really happens. Normal.

Maggie Heely  40:21  
Yeah, that's odd. And you'll

Sharon Rumsey  40:23  
literally have some little eight, you know, 80 year old woman trying to carry your chair on the hill and, yeah,

Maggie Heely  40:31  
heels digging,

Kristina Stubblefield  40:32  
this would be a great time to say, you know, if you're listening to this podcast, awesome on whatever your favorite podcast platform. But if you really want to see behind the scenes of the recording of this episode you want make sure you go to our YouTube channel and see the video because it would be well worth it for this. But then like

Maggie Heely  40:50  
at the same time, don't you also feel like okay, I get it, I get why giddy if you have 150 guests, and you don't want to pay for double seven bucks a chair. It's like on one hand I so validate and like understand where the couples are coming from. But on the other hand, I'm like, Guys, you I promise that that extra however much money if you can swing it, like you're not gonna want to see people carrying?

Kristina Stubblefield  41:08  
Well, I was thinking to myself hiring someone to move the chairs. Sure. Not even asking the guests

Sharon Rumsey  41:15  
Well, there. That's even there. Our chair companies pros and cons that when they deliver your chairs, they will keep people on site. And for I think it's $1 a chair the last time I did it, I don't know if they will move. I just did it at Whitehall with Mike this past summer. But for $1 a chair, they will keep people on site to move the chairs from ceremony to reception.

Maggie Heely  41:37  
And that's kind of clean because the guests could be over in the garden

Sharon Rumsey  41:41  
or the guests moving them. But still it's a lot of clanging and banging and

Kristina Stubblefield  41:45  
I feel it just went when in my mind was the grandparents, your older guests and stuff like that.

Sharon Rumsey  41:51  
Nobody who's a guest should have to carry their chair. I mean, I just it's a thing. Yeah. Well,

Kristina Stubblefield  41:54  
you know what? To each their own? Yeah. And it's up to you about your wedding. And this

Michael Gaddie  42:00  
claimer. Yeah. But do you really want but really remembering about it? You know, I'm gonna sit down and we're having a conversation with some friends and said, Hey, can you believe I had to carry my chair? And you will hear that from the heel? To the reception? Not how great not how great their beautiful the bride was? Or how great the food was? Or how pretty the

Maggie Heely  42:20  
patty? Aren't we just

Sharon Rumsey  42:23  
totally do it. I will totally be

Kristina Stubblefield  42:25  
over. This takes too far of a tone. Yes. Get us back on track. Okay, so all in all, I think we can wrap this episode up with, if you're planning this yourself with no help from a wedding professional as a planner, or a coordinator. Really put thought into what's going to play take place on the wedding day, allotting enough time, having a written schedule a timeline of how that's going to happen. Make sure you leave enough room in there to breathe,

Maggie Heely  42:54  
and give it to the people who need it and have just have it in your brain

Kristina Stubblefield  42:58  
and also have dedicated people if stuff needs to be moved, some kind of action needs to be taken. Not that that needs to happen, but also who's going to help write that happen.

Sharon Rumsey  43:08  
And my only caveat to that would be to utilize your vendor team. Make sure that they have that timeline, get their input and say what do you need to make your day successful

Kristina Stubblefield  43:20  
communication? We're back to communication, communicating with those vendors, and making sure they're going to help. Yep, agreed. Okay, well, it sounds like she's gonna come back and meet another guest. I can't wait for that one.

Maggie Heely  43:32  
I'll just be a part of the team Mike. Awesome. Yeah. Mike,

Kristina Stubblefield  43:36  
I'm just glad you got a word in because I didn't know if you or not, he didn't forget today. Yes. Okay. Thank you all so much for listening. Maggie, thank you for taking time to come in. And we would love to hear your feedback on this episode. Make sure to click subscribe. And if you like what you hear, take a few minutes to write us a glowing five star review. Until next time everyone stay safe.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of The Ring The Bling And All The Things. If you liked what you heard, make sure to hit the subscribe or follow button on your favorite podcast platform to get notified of upcoming episodes. You can also visit our website, ringblingallthethings.com where you can join our email list and get notifications about new episodes and other information. You can also follow us on your favorite social media platforms.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

Maggie Heely Profile Photo

Maggie Heely

Weekend Wedding Warriors are the logistics experts. They don’t plan your wedding for you, but they do execute it on your behalf. That way you, your family and friends aren’t stuck working and can enjoy your wedding to the fullest! So, you plan the perfect wedding, and we’ll make sure your special day runs smoothly.

Maggie Heely started Weekend Wedding Warrior in 2010, not long after her own wedding where she realized that after all her careful planning there was no one to pass the work on to on the wedding day. Maggie has a unique background. She was awarded a Masters of Science in Marriage and Family Therapy from Northwestern University’s prestigious Family Institute in Evanston, IL in 2006 and is currently a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) in the state of Kentucky. No, she won’t give you therapy at your event, but she does bring a unique crisis-management perspective and calming energy.

Maggie is a Louisville Business First 2016 40 Under 40 and was named Woman Business Owner of the Year in the Small Business category by NAWBO Louisville 2014.

She was married in 2008 to her husband who is a Major in the U.S. Army Reserves. They have a daughter, Aurora, and son, Knox.

Maggie believes you should be able to both plan your wedding and enjoy your wedding day. Let the professionals at Weekend Wedding Warrior handle the logistics of your wedding so you can focus on what’s really important…Getting Married!