In this episode, co-hosts Kristina, Mike & Sharon talk about dated wedding & reception traditions that you are not bound to follow… And that in these modern times, you and your fiancé get to decide what fits you best. It’s your day… you do what YOU want! YOU DO YOU!
Tune in to this week’s “THINGS YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO” episode to hear about the BOLD brides that have come before you in pink wedding dresses, served pie instead of cake, walked themselves down the aisle, said no to a flower girl, no to a ring bearer, and heck no to a bouquet toss!
Listen in while co-hosts Kristina, Mike & Sharon talk about dated wedding and reception traditions that you DO NOT have to feel obligated to follow. Your wedding is about YOU! You get to decide what fits you and your beloved the best. If it is important to you and you want to do it, then do it! If not, LET IT GO!
Did you know that the only vote that counts when planning a wedding and reception is the one wearing the white dress? And, did you know that the white dress is just an option by the way? You aren’t a pre-boxed “Barbie Bride” so don’t try to be one to please everyone else. It’s your day! Do what YOU want!
BY THE TIME YOU FINISH LISTENING, YOU’LL DISCOVER that there is no wedding book that tells you exactly what you should do. You get to write your own rule book!
Share your BOLD non-traditional wedding or reception stories with us and tag us on Facebook or Instagram @theringtheblingandallthethings
For more information on The Ring The Bling And All The Things Podcast, visit: https://www.ringblingallthethingspodcast.com/
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Kristina Stubblefield 0:00
3,2,1.. (singing) It’s my wedding, I can do what I want to! It’s my wedding, I can do what I want to!
Sharon Rumsey 0:10
If it's important to you do it. If not let it go.
Michael Gaddie 0:17
You don't have to be a traditionalist and try to fit it into the Barbie broad box. There is not a wedding rulebook. Write your own
Kristina Stubblefield 0:25
pink wedding dresses, pies instead of cake. Walking yourself down the aisle. No flower girl, no ringbearer no bouquet toss. Yelp, bold brides have come before you to do their wedding their way. How will you do yours? You got engaged. Congratulations. Happy? Yes. joyful time. Of course. Now what timelines to do lists and checklists. 100% Don't worry, you're in the right place. Welcome to the ring, the bling, and all the things. Hi, I'm Kristina Stubblefield, one of your hosts, along with my two good friends, Michael Gaddie. And Sharon Rumsey. We have over 50 years of wedding industry experience between us. We have seen it, heard it, done it and found a way around it. We are here to get you from down on one knee to down the aisle. Our podcast will cover everything from you saying yes to the I do's and all that happens in between. So buckle up and enjoy the journey. Now let's get started with this episode.
Sharon Rumsey 1:52
So often brides will ask me, aren't I supposed to do this? Don't I have to do that on wedding day? And honestly, the answer is they don't have to do anything on wedding day. It's their day.
Michael Gaddie 2:08
So today's episode, we are going to talk about a few things that you do not have to do. So starting off with, for example, you do not have to have a flower girl or a ring bear sunlight.
Kristina Stubblefield 2:20
You don't have to have the little kids going down the aisle.
Michael Gaddie 2:23
Definitely not. And more and more. I mean, you will all have brides asked me all the time. So I'm debating on doing this or not doing this what do you think me personally, as a wedding vendor? Don't have a kid in the wedding. Now, if it's your niece or your little son or a little daughter, that's one thing. But I mean, really, it's not something that is mandatory to do and I think you need to look at the relationship.
Sharon Rumsey 2:50
That's what I was gonna ask how else are you to that, but I have couples
Michael Gaddie 2:53
that will come and say, well, we're trying to find one. Why do you if you don't know somebody?
Sharon Rumsey 3:00
There you got a one 800 Renner ring?
Kristina Stubblefield 3:03
Oh, goodness gracious. We don't know, by the way we do not disclaimer, we do not know where that phone number goes.
Sharon Rumsey 3:11
I do have a lot of times though, that a bride will say our groom will say my mom doesn't want to hurt my cousin's feelings. So we've got to put their daughter in the wedding or something like that. And I just that's a definite No,
Michael Gaddie 3:23
yeah. And don't let your mother or father or grandmother anybody make that decision for
Kristina Stubblefield 3:29
Okay, now, Mike, you're hopping episodes over? Because we got an episode about what is it about choosing your squad, choosing your squat. But in all honesty, I hadn't really thought about that. It really should go down to the relationship, the people that make a difference in your life that you want standing next to you in that moment, this such a momentous occasion in your life, not just because you thought you had to have this person next to you or to walk down the aisle or have that aspect of it. So that's a really good point.
Michael Gaddie 4:03
So forget the kids for now.
Sharon Rumsey 4:06
Another thing that a lot of my couples will ask me is, say they have 300 guests at their wedding, which before COVID was quite often, you know, a lot of weddings had that type of guests count. Is it necessary for them to take time out and go around to each table and speak to every guest? And while I understand the thought behind that? No, it's not necessary. There's 300 people there, they know that you cannot possibly talk to everyone. And they want to enjoy their day. They want to get out on that dance floor and have a good time. But I know I'm getting the look from my coworker who thinks that I am wrong on this but I'm
Kristina Stubblefield 4:50
gonna stand by it. One thing, disclaimer, again, in this episode twice. What we're saying here is just topics that we you're discussing, this isn't in stone, this isn't a new way of doing things. We're just basically talking about topics that have come up. It's about it being your day. So when you listen to us talk about it. We're given our own scenarios if we were in those shoes, okay, so go ahead, Mike, I know you're chomping at the bit.
Michael Gaddie 5:21
So I mean, understand that they don't have to do that. But I feel like if you've taken the time to send them an invitation, they've taken the time out of their day to come to your wedding, bring you a gift, I think the least they can do is walk around. You don't have to have a conversation with them. But just go up to every person that is they are every couple and say, I appreciate you being here for us today. Thank you and move on. But
Sharon Rumsey 5:49
if you have 300
Michael Gaddie 5:49
I understand but you know what? That just I think it's coming at, you know, courtesy to do that. I just made that. So that's two different opinions.
Kristina Stubblefield 5:59
What's the great thing about this, we can all have opinions. And I think what the whole point of this is, is at the end of the day, it's your event, you get to decide what fits you and your fiance best, correct, you know, not necessarily. Now, if your parents are paying for it, you probably have to have a conversation there. But at the end of the day, Sharon's favorite saying is Sharon, what matters. The only vote that counts is the one in the white dress. So I think it's good to give these opinions and it's okay that they're different.
Sharon Rumsey 6:32
So we're just bringing up today the things that we hear the most often, but honestly, there could be 100 different topics. Okay, well, let's
Kristina Stubblefield 6:40
stick to the list. What's our next one,
Michael Gaddie 6:42
so our next one is sometimes broad say all the bridesmaids dresses have to match. They don't. The best thing is for the bride to pick their color palette. And then let the bridesmaids pick out whatever dress they were I mean they the dresses does not have to match and it could be different shades of that one certain color.
Kristina Stubblefield 7:02
And I don't think you have to do too much searching on Pinterest to see all the different types of colors, combinations, patterns, there's so many different things available. You can really find some inspiration there to fit what what you're looking for or maybe just something to kind of start and then create your own vision from there.
Michael Gaddie 7:26
Well every bra every bridesmaid is built different to I mean you may have a very thin girl you may have a heavier girl and you want them to feel comfortable for that holiday to
Kristina Stubblefield 7:37
you know I've also seen to athletic, you know when you're talking about younger bridesmaids, you can have some that are very athletic and they they might not want to wear certain types of dresses or attire something that
Sharon Rumsey 7:52
I've really noticed too is a comfortable bridesmaid takes a better picture. Someone is happier and has if you put someone in a dress that they're uncomfortable in or they feel like they're popping out of in all the wrong places which would definitely happen to me. If if you put a woman in a dress like that she's so self conscious and she's trying to cover up what she's uncomfortable about and she's not focused on what's actually going on and in the picture.
Kristina Stubblefield 8:20
And at the end of the day those pictures we talked about. Those are memories you're gonna have for our long
Unknown Speaker 8:25
so the more I have to
Michael Gaddie 8:26
mention this because when we were growing up and payment I was already married. And some good friends of ours were getting married and Pam was in the wedding and I was too but the dress that was chosen back then 30 years ago you all the dresses matched it didn't matter what it was it was purple
Kristina Stubblefield 8:43
weight and got size.
Sharon Rumsey 8:45
For the dress you were told to wear well
Michael Gaddie 8:47
it was a strapless gown and Pam had to wear a strapless bra strapless bra and pants big busted. And I'm telling you it was the most uncomfortable thing for her I felt sorry for her because she had to deal with it. And we even had an argue in an argument about it while she was getting ready because she felt so uncomfortable. So why would you put your bridesmaids do that?
Sharon Rumsey 9:13
Right? Just let them choose choose.
Kristina Stubblefield 9:16
Okay, let's also talk about though the age differences. You can have a bridesmaid that is older, younger. So a type of dress a strapless strapless dress might not be appropriate for a younger person in your wedding party. I'm not speaking about necessarily the flower girl, but I've seen bridesmaids and groomsmen that have been from teenagers to up there in age. Let me make sure I get it politically correct.
Sharon Rumsey 9:47
And even for the guys. You know and I go to a lot of suit appointments. And even for the guys I've had a few grooms lately that chose their dad to be their best man. Well A dad in his 50 years 50s or 60s is not going to wear the ultra slim cut suit, like your best friend in his 20s is going to wear? That's exactly right.
Kristina Stubblefield 10:10
Well, he might wear it. But again, let's go back to the pictures being memory, not our lifetime. He's
Sharon Rumsey 10:14
not gonna set a lot in it. No, right.
Michael Gaddie 10:17
We reppin that.
Kristina Stubblefield 10:19
Yes, I think that's that I think that is a really good topic. Who's got the next one? Sure.
Sharon Rumsey 10:25
One of the things I get asked a lot is do I have to make a seating chart? The Wedding Planner in me says, Yes, we need a seating chart. But it becomes so stressful. And I end up at a table with a mom and a bride and a groom and the mother of the groom. And they're trying to decide who likes who and who gets along with who who in the family is not speaking to who so we have to put those people separately. And if you have enough, enough seating availability, to where you don't have to fill every table to capacity, then my answer is reserved some tables for immediate family and let it go. Because it becomes so much of a headache. And you're you're trying so hard to make sure every single guest is comfortable, which is great. And the time that it comes in handy is when you you only have one, one chair for every single guest there you don't have extra. But if you have extra, and people can space themselves out comfortably in set where they choose, it's just such a big headache off the bride and groom and it normally works out just fine.
Kristina Stubblefield 11:35
I think that's an awesome idea. And something you don't have to cause yourself so much stress over
Michael Gaddie 11:41
well, and I'll tell you what that has been the number one thing that brides and moms gets an argument is that thing seating chart, I wouldn't even waste the time or the energy to even think about I
Sharon Rumsey 11:55
even had girls that trace pennies, and they cut out 250 pennies and each Penny gets a name on it. We're moving them around to this table in that table. And at the end of the day, I'm just like, you know what, let's
Michael Gaddie 12:07
set up three extra tables. So we know we have enough seats, and just let it go. My sister worked on this for I know four weeks, she had paper plates all over her dining room table with sticky dots. Yes. And every dog had a person's name on it. I thought the time you're spinning on This is nuts. And
Sharon Rumsey 12:25
then you have to figure out how you're gonna display it.
Kristina Stubblefield 12:28
And there's a hook now that's a whole episode. Okay, what's the next one we got?
Michael Gaddie 12:34
Next thing is you don't need to have a unity candle or sand ceremony. Really?
Sharon Rumsey 12:42
I plan a damn tree.
Kristina Stubblefield 12:45
What is it was Sharon and this tree every time we talk about this a little bit you know cuz she Sharon likes to plan. We got to plan what episodes were What's our topics? We got to know ahead of time. Do you have your notes? Dan is a planner. And every time this topic comes up, she talks about this damn tree. Here, What do you have against trees? Well, so
Sharon Rumsey 13:09
I had a wedding. And the thought, when we thought it out, it was it seemed like a good idea. They wanted each set of grandparents to bring a jar of dirt from their respective yards, each set of parents to bring a jar of dirt from their respective yards. And then a couple of special like aunts and uncles each brought a jar of dirt. And the thought was we would we would pick up the jar we would say this is from my grandma's yard, pour it in a pot. This is from my Aunt Sally jar, pour it in a pot, and we would get all the dirt in there and it would join all the families. And we would plant this tree and as the tree grew. But the thing is, I'm the wedding planner. It's 15 minutes before my bride walks. I go back there nobody labeled their dirt. Now what do you do?
Kristina Stubblefield 14:06
You stick some labels on it and go on.
Sharon Rumsey 14:09
That's exactly what happened. So I don't know if uncle Johnny poured his dirt. RP poured aunt
Kristina Stubblefield 14:14
Sally's everybody's dirt was there. It was are we really talking about this? But then you got it
Unknown Speaker 14:21
we go. You asked me?
Kristina Stubblefield 14:22
I did. There had to be something about it.
Michael Gaddie 14:25
Never heard of that. I've never heard of that.
Sharon Rumsey 14:27
And then you've got you got to water it. So the tree will stay in it. Then you've got mud and abroad in a white dress. I'm not saying anything else.
Kristina Stubblefield 14:36
Okay, so about trees might go ahead and we're gonna say,
Michael Gaddie 14:39
I'm so blown away.
Sharon Rumsey 14:42
I tend to have that effect on people.
Michael Gaddie 14:46
I mean, the thing is, sometimes when you do this little ceremony to bring the family together or whatever, sometimes I feel like it's just something to take up space during the ceremony and that's really not necessary.
Kristina Stubblefield 15:00
You know, Sharon, I was at a wedding with you recently. And well, we were there doing things. But my point to this was it was a Catholic wedding, and they did not do the Unity handle. I didn't even know that was an option. I didn't know if that was, you know, I grew up, I am Catholic, and I went to a Catholic school attended many a Catholic weddings. And it was always done. I don't know maybe if I just haven't been to one off the top of my mind recently. But that stood out to me. Not that I minded that they didn't do it. But I just in my mind, let
Michael Gaddie 15:35
me say this, this is just a little tip. About five years ago, the Catholic religion decided that that was not allowed in the Catholic Church. The candle that was not allowed. So for about five years, that disappeared, it's changed
Kristina Stubblefield 15:55
now like not the flame, not the candle,
Sharon Rumsey 15:58
the ceremony or anything, it was not a Whitehead priest, actually, when we're at rehearsal, and we're talking about it, they will say that it is not biblical, like nowhere in the Bible does it say anything about a unity candle, and I had a lot of couples and families that was upset because they would not let them have that unity candle. But
Michael Gaddie 16:19
this is news to me. In the last year and a half, I kid you not it has come back into the Catholic Church.
Sharon Rumsey 16:25
There's also something in the Catholic Church now too. It's called a lassoing. that I did in a wedding in January, that was really, really cool that I had never seen before. And it's it's kind of reminds me of the hand tying ceremony, but it's a little bit different. But any of those unity ceremonies if they're important to you, do them. If it's just a box, you feel like you have to check, let it go. Let
Michael Gaddie 16:56
it go. Let it go. I mean, if it's important to you definitely do it. But don't feel like you have to do it. Can
Kristina Stubblefield 17:02
we talk about the one of the examples that you had mentioned that someone had done instead of the sand the Unity candle? Will you share that? Sure. I think that's a this is such a cool story. Or actually, I
Michael Gaddie 17:14
think this is a great idea. But the couple actually does their vows and they broke their vows out. And they actually during the ceremony, they will take those vows, fold them up, put them in a wooden box along with a bottle of wine, and they actually hammer the box shut now the box shut. And then what has been come to me that every year, every anniversary, they would open that box up, they would read those vowels, drink that bottle of wine, but also write another letter to each other, put it in there and enclose it back up with another bottle of wine. And they do that every anniversary. I love that. I thought that's absolutely wonderful, actually,
Kristina Stubblefield 17:59
and what you had mentioned, like you could get 50 years down the road and have 50 notes back on trees that you can pass on it just yeah. And I say Well, why
Michael Gaddie 18:09
don't you nail it shut? And Can't we just get a box with a lid on it? Well, if you have to actually pry the box open every year together, it's not something that you're going to be easily just to go grab the bottle of wine. Let's
Sharon Rumsey 18:20
face it most women if that box wasn't nailed shut, I'd go read that letter.
Michael Gaddie 18:25
You're right. You're right. I
Sharon Rumsey 18:26
mean I know point. Oh, yeah. So not that self discipline. I
Kristina Stubblefield 18:29
just thought that was a something different unique. All right, Sharon, what do you got next?
Sharon Rumsey 18:35
A lot of My Brides nowadays they don't care one iota about tossing a bouquet or a garter. It's, it's kind of something I'm seeing less and less, it's dated, it's dated. And it goes back to, you know, the, the women want to get married and they need to get married. And they're gonna catch that, okay. And a lot of brides nowadays are just like, I have a lot of single friends and they're perfectly fine being single, you know, they don't want to be called out to catch up. Okay. So I feel like again, if it's something that's special to you do it but if not let it go.
Michael Gaddie 19:14
And and that's got to be a personal thing, too. Because usually when I'm sitting in a consultation with abroad and her mom, that's usually who I'm with. The mom always says, you know, we get to the end of the contract. Now we give you a toss bouquet every time it doesn't matter if you ask for it or not. It's on the contract. But the mother will always say, Oh, we need to talk. Okay. And then the bottom site mom, no, we don't we don't need that. We're not doing that. But what I have found is that they're taken and not doing a toss bouquet. And you may have seen this too, but they're doing an anniversary dance. So basically, every couple gets up on the dance floor, and they say who's been married 10 years or less when they sit down than who's been married 20 years or less. And then usually it's like the grandparents that's been married 50 something years and then That would be, that would be the couple that would get a little bulky. And I think that's a good gesture.
Sharon Rumsey 20:04
I love that. I call it the generation stance on the anniversary dance. It's the same thing. One of the things I love to do is so you keep you're married, you're newly married couple out there the whole time, the DJ starts dismissing people off the floor, according to how long they've been married. So at the end, like Mike said, you only have your newly married couple, and your couple that's been married the longest out of anyone in the room. So I love to have the DJ, go and ask that married couple that's been married, you know, 50 years or 45 years, what their advice is for the newly married couple. And it's always so funny. When my husband and I got married, we actually had a couple that had been married for 50 years. And the, the wife said, I have prayed for my husband every night for 50 years. It's the last thing I do when I shut my eyes. I pray for my husband. And you know, you could hear everybody in the room going, Oh, that's so sweet. And then, when the DJ asked the husband what his advice was, he said, nod your head, I've nodded my head for 50 years, every day, I nod my head. And it actually caused them to get into a fight. Yeah, but I love to pull things like that in in place of, you know, the garter or the bouquet.
Kristina Stubblefield 21:23
And I'm gonna tell you, I know I've mentioned Pinterest before, but even online searches, there's so many different, unique things that you can do that is not the traditional. And it goes back to what Sharon said in the beginning about making it your own.
Michael Gaddie 21:39
Kristina Stubblefield 21:40
who's up next, Mike, you got going?
Michael Gaddie 21:41
I do. A lot of brides wonder if they should have their father walking down the aisle or their grandfather walk them down. Now. When Pam and I got married, Pam, his mom walked her down the aisle. But today you're seeing more women being more independent. And you know, an independent woman can walk down the aisle by herself. And a lot of times you're seeing more brides just walk down the aisle alone. And there's nothing wrong with that.
Sharon Rumsey 22:10
Absolutely not no one has to give her away. She's choosing to get married herself. The only place you run into trouble with that is sometimes if you have a daddy that has a little girl, just like that little girl's dreamed about her wedding day her whole life, right? her daddy has dreamed about that moment, his whole life. So it's a discussion between that Father and that daughter that they have to have. And I think that,
Michael Gaddie 22:37
you know, if their father or daughters close, I don't even think that would be an option. That's true. But if you were thinking, Okay, my father is passed away, or you don't have a relationship with him. Don't feel like that you have to have somebody do that
Sharon Rumsey 22:56
you don't do you don't have to have a wedding coming up. Mike and I together. Were the the bride felt strongly that she's not not being given away. Any more than the groom is being given away. They're both choosing freely to be married. So I think they're doing something really neat. His parents, both of his parents are walking him down the aisle, and then taking their seats in both of her parents are walking her down the aisle and taking their seats. So you're showing that that fam those two families are coming together. But it's not, you know, giving someone away.
Kristina Stubblefield 23:30
And I really think it's important to because Mike, you mentioned this when we were talking about flower girls, ring bears that kind of thing. You don't have to just go and find somebody because you think that you needed to have that male figure. walk you down the aisle. You don't even have to put yourself necessarily in that situation. Now if you have a relationship with someone, and you want to do that together great. But if not, the whole point of this is you don't have to have somebody to have Okay, who's up next chair and you've got another one? I
Sharon Rumsey 24:04
bet I do. You don't have to spend your entire wedding morning on this one's for the ladies. Getting your hair and makeup done.
Kristina Stubblefield 24:15
What you mean I don't have to be in the chair for hours.
Sharon Rumsey 24:18
You don't see a lot of girls. That's part of what they look forward to. They love to turn on some good music have some mimosas and get their hair and makeup done. But I have some brides that hair and makeup is not their thing. They would much rather be out doing something fun. A lot of the times the groom and groomsmen will go play golf or they'll go you know we're in Kentucky they'll go on a bourbon tour or something like that. So it's if the ladies want to do an activity and then come in and do their own hair and makeup. I think that's okay. I don't think that they have to be put in hair and makeup jalaw morning if they don't want to be I think this is an awesome point because Because I think some people just assume a hawk out, I have four hours blocked off to, or I gotta start at 7am. But I'm not getting married until 6pm average time for us to start a wedding with a bridal party of seven to eight on each side is 630 or seven, two, that
Michael Gaddie 25:16
takes a lot of time. A lot of times
Kristina Stubblefield 25:18
it does. And you're supposed to make it until like 12 or 1am, like midnight or 1am. And that's why it goes back to what you say about eating breakfast and yeah, you gotta got such a big department. But that's a really that's a really interesting take on what you're saying about what if you're not all into that I don't want to call it glitz and glam but if that's not who you are, you don't have to be made up so to speak. And we talked about this in other episodes, you can be natural, and but those pictures it's just different if you don't have any makeup on at all. But I love your point about you don't have to spend your entire day there.
Michael Gaddie 26:01
Well, you know, and with makeup too. I mean, sometimes I've gone to weddings and the bride is so made up You don't even know what's her and not saying that's a bad thing or a good thing because I know she wants to be the princess for the day and all that but sometimes I think it's overdone that and you have to do
Sharon Rumsey 26:21
makeup artists really, really do
Kristina Stubblefield 26:23
you do because there's a fine line between not having enough and you look completely washed out with photos because the cameras and everything even cell phone cameras nowadays are so detailed. There's so many pixels megapixels, whatever the exact word is. And you you want to have some color in your we could talk about but we have another episode that talks about my guests so we don't have to stick to it. But sharing great point about that about not getting caught up in that chair all day.
Michael Gaddie 26:53
This will be this will surprise some people but um, you don't have to wear your traditional white or ivory. A lot of brides think yes, I've got to have a white gown. That's to be honest with you. The white gown is not the most popular color ivory is the most popular or maybe even a candlelight. But I'm seeing believe this or not. I'm seeing pink. I'm seeing I'm even seeing a blue. No, I'm talking a pink. I had Miss Kentucky that I did not too long ago and her dress was pink. And it was stunning.
Kristina Stubblefield 27:31
We're gonna need a picture of that for our social media because she's we're listening to this. You know, it's hard to get you thinking in your mind, but I bet she was absolutely beautiful.
Michael Gaddie 27:39
I've had a broad wear pink. I've had a broad wear block, believe it or not, and it was very tastefully done. So don't feel like you have to wear white just because mom says you have to wear white or ivory. Don't feel like you don't have to
Sharon Rumsey 27:55
fit into the Barbie bride box. Exactly.
You know, we just had a wedding this summer, the bride wore a straw hat. And she wore it in her ceremony.
Kristina Stubblefield 28:06
I can't imagine her not wearing the hat.
Sharon Rumsey 28:09
And if you look at the pictures, it was her. And that that's really what it all boils down to is you got to make it your day. It's a reflection of revenue of the engaged couple to me. It's about wanting our bridesmaids to be comfortable that my gosh, you want your bride to be comfortable. Yeah.
Kristina Stubblefield 28:28
Well, these are the I mean, these are all really good. And I know we could keep going on do you all have more?
Michael Gaddie 28:33
We do have more but we could go on and on and on.
Kristina Stubblefield 28:36
Do we need to do a part two or what? What's our other topics? What do you want to do?
Sharon Rumsey 28:42
Just a couple of the things that I had are super quick. Um, I think that a lot of brides now are getting away from wedding cake. They don't like it. But they still feel like they need it for that cake cutting moment. You don't have to do that if you don't want to if you both hate cake why are you doing it? Why are you having a wedding cake have pie have ice cream Oreos, you know, whatever your favorite thing is Krispy Kreme donut, you don't have
Kristina Stubblefield 29:11
a wedding cake but I've also seen people do just small ones because they do want to take those photos and things like that. But they've had other things they've liked. I've seen cookie bars I don't even know if that's what I love
Sharon Rumsey 29:22
the little miniature pies I've done that. Yeah,
Kristina Stubblefield 29:25
the donut walls they've done have even I've seen some have done a variety. It hasn't just been one thing a lot of couples
Sharon Rumsey 29:30
are choosing now also not to do the traditional have the deejay call everyone over to the cake table for this huge moment. Like they just go with their photographer and cut their cake and nobody's called over there are just their moment is their moment.
Kristina Stubblefield 29:47
Interesting. Interesting. Okay, Mike, what else do you got? You're gonna let Sharon talk? No,
Michael Gaddie 29:53
she's got one more. Go with it, Sharon.
Sharon Rumsey 29:55
Another thing that I see a lot. brides asked me They have to have a memory table, or a memorial table because their mom or their grandma or somebody feels like they should acknowledge people in the family that have passed away. That's a really personal decision. And for some couples, it makes them sad. And I don't think you need a table with a candle and a picture on it. To know that that person is there with you on your wedding day. So if it's going to make you sad, I think it's it's nixed I think you don't do that.
Kristina Stubblefield 30:33
And I think what you've said, there is enough to say about this. It needs to be what makes you all feel the most comfortable. Correct. I really do think that's good. And I'm glad that we decided to do this. I know, we tossed this idea around. But I think these were all items, just to shed some light on, you know, maybe people are wondering this. We know it's been brought up, Sharon, you mentioned that several times by people you've talked to. And at the end of the day, a lot of our episodes, we have said it's your all's day make it about you. Of course there are some elements that you might want to incorporate in regarding your parents or people that are special to you. But it all comes back to it being your day.
Michael Gaddie 31:17
Definitely. So just keep that in mind. When you're planning your wedding. Don't feel like you have to follow any kind of rule book or anything. This is about you. You do what you want. And include who you want.
Sharon Rumsey 31:28
Yeah, write your own book.
Kristina Stubblefield 31:30
I think that's great. And we would love to hear about your story. Have you already gotten married? Are you engaged and you're in the midst of planning? We want to hear from you, Sharon, tell them how they can talk to us.
Sharon Rumsey 31:45
You can find us at our website, the ring, the bling, and all the things.com. Feel free to dm us on Instagram, send us your story, send us your questions, we promise we read them all.
Kristina Stubblefield 31:57
And we got this cool new feature that you can click the microphone on our website, it says share with us and you can record a message. Maybe you want to share about how you got engaged or where you are in your wedding planning. Maybe you've come across issues, or I don't hate to say problems. But maybe you've encountered something and you want to ask us about it. Hit that share it with us. And we read all of those, and we may use it in one of our upcoming episodes. So until next time, we love sharing all these topics and fun with you all but connect with us on social media. And make sure to check out we are now sharing the videos from our recording. And I'm gonna say it again. Karen loves it. She loves it. So go to her. She's
Michael Gaddie 32:42
rolling her eyes,
Kristina Stubblefield 32:44
right? She can't wait for me to hit the end button. But we get bloopers and everything. And I tell you what, we're trying to get some more meet and share and we feel like a lot. But in all honesty,
Michael Gaddie 32:54
we just had to throw that in there didn't
Kristina Stubblefield 32:56
we just really love to connect with people. And we didn't want YouTube to be left out in all of our social media. So find us on YouTube, hit the subscribe button. Our episodes, make sure that you go and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform and hit the download button and download those episodes and then
Sharon Rumsey 33:16
leave us a glowing five star review.
Kristina Stubblefield 33:19
That's Sharon's favorite word. Okay, guys, stay safe. Until next time, we'll see you then.
Thank you for tuning in to this episode of the ring doubling and all the things. If you like what you heard, make sure to hit the subscribe button to get notified of upcoming episodes. You can also visit our website, the ring, the bling and all the things.com for past episodes, and make sure to connect with us on social media. If you would like to help us get the word out about this podcast. Make sure to share with your family, your friends and anyone you know in the wedding business.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai